Lasting Peace

A little bird told me....

2008-08-05T17:56:00.002-04:00

Word on the street is that Megan and Mitch (and most likely Megan's parents) summited Mt. Kilimanjaro! Congrats are totally in order. Once Megan's home this weekend I'll be able to confirm the gossip. :)

Finding Love

2008-07-28T16:17:00.005-04:00

I've been thinking a lot lately about the Pre-Unit students Megan and I taught at the orphanage. There are moments when my heart literally aches for them. Due to the circumstances of my departure, I wasn't able to say goodbye to them. I have dreams at night of playing football in the yard with them and wrapping my arms around their tiny little bodies. I can hear their voices shouting in unison, "Sank you teacha!"

Magnus mentioned to us early on that his boss told him before leaving for Tanzania that "Africa will get in your blood." At the point in time when he mentioned this, none of us (Megan, Magnus, Morgan, and I) really felt as if we'd fall head over heels for this crazy continent. Now that I've been home for nearly a month, however, I can feel Africa cursing through my blood. I want to go back. Badly.

The kids at the orphanage provided me with the greatest gift-- the ability to love myself right now. I've always carried a little bit of self-doubt in the back of my mind. It's been a constant friend of mine over the years. Through my students, however, I was able to release the self-doubt and find joy in who I am. Don't worry, I haven't become a narcissist, I've just been taught how to appreciate myself. I can look in the mirror and see the hair Nuru stroked ever so gently. I can place my hands on my hips and feel Esuphat's arms wrapped around me. I can laugh and hear Freddy laughing along with me. I can stand tall and proud and know that there are 17 little kids in Tanzania who believe in me. 17 kids whose hearts I carry within mine.

Thank you Pre-Unit for making my life so wonderful.

On one of my last days, my students performed for a visiting church group. I love how this video truly shows each of my students' unique personalities.

:)

2008-07-21T07:52:00.000-04:00

FRIDAY

Today, we went on a school fieldtrip to the conservation site where
Mitch had been previously been working. We met with the 80 kids we
were taking and 2 teachers. There was no need to count the number of
kids or keep track of them like a fieldtrip in the U.S., jus start
walking and they all will follow. Once we arrived at the project
site, our host father, Samwell, spoke to the kids about a few plants.
Then, they played around drinking and splashing water on themselves
and each other. They appeared to be having a blast. One student even
recommended that we take them here every Friday. I love conversing
with several of the students, but one in particular really stands out
to me, Wai (pronounced 'why'). He is older and has a wonderful
vocabulary. He asks me all sorts of questions about the U.S. on a
regular basis in addition to the questions about UFO'S, my favorite
foods and how I get to school. I had to repress my laughter when
another student said that her favorite American food was "Coco Puffs."
I'm pretty sure I've never even had those in my life.

SATURDAY

Kordula, a friend from Switzerland, arrived to Moshi on Saturday
morning. We walked over to Chagga to rent some bikes for the day.
After some slightly annoying bargaining (where we did not come out on
top), we left the shop with 4 bikes, 3 with working brakes, and 1
where the chain falls off every couple of minutes. Once we got out of
town, the ride was very beautiful. We had a lot of time to see it as
we were always going uphill. We rode through many coffee plantations
and small villages. The route was supposed to get us to the Mwenka
gate of Kilimanjaro National Park, however, I think we turned around a
few kilometers from our goal. Fortunately, I didn't have to pedal
After stopping by Mr. Price Grocery andonce on the way down
returning the bikes, we walked over to Kindoroko Hotel and had a drink
on the rooftop bar where there is supposed to be a wonderful view of
Kilimanjaro (when the clouds are missing).

SUNDAY

I woke up nice and early to go to church with Oscar. Service began at 8am and was actually the most punctual event I had attended since arriving in Africa. The “two hour” service lasted until 10:30am. It was fun to attend, even though it was all in Swahili. Much of the time was consumed by singing and dancing. There were only short segments of preaching. I also took sacrament at the front of the church and unlike the grape juice I was used to I drank a tiny glass of “white wine.” I have never tasted any white wine like that before…

MONDAY

I finally had the students write their pen-pal letters:) They were very excited and involved in all of their letters. This was the first activity that I really noticed the difference in academic levels among this class of 46. Some clearly excelled in English, while others copied straight from their workbooks. That part of the class made me very sad and I asked them to rewrite about their own hobbies and use their own names in their letters. After analyzing their looks of confusion, I quickly realized that they were not able to do this activity on their own. Later, I will send the letters to the U.S. and probably make my way to the best smelling place in Moshi – the Patisserie.

This might be my last post – unless I decide to squeeze one more in. My parents will be here on Thursday and therefore I will head back to Arusha to meet with them. Our plan is to climb Mt. Kilimanjaro, go on safari in the Serengeti and relax in Zanzibar for the final days :)

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...

2008-07-18T04:51:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, Izzy, Mitch and I were invited to eat dinner at Mr. Masam’s, a blind teacher at our school. We walked to his house from the school. His sister-in-law’s daughter walks him to and from school everyday and she escorted us to his house as well. He has a beautiful family; 3 daughters and 1 son. His wife, sister and daughter’s were preparing the meal and we sat around the table conversing. Mr. Masam left the table and returned with a stack of about 10 self-help books that were written all in English. These books could obviously not be for him seeing as they were not written in Brail or Swahili. Izzy asked if he had read the books and he replied, “No, these are not for me. These are for all of my visitors.” By “visitors,” I can only assume that he meant stressed-out, westerners. It was pretty funny that he had bought a stack of self-help books that he never planned to read, but thought that we could benefit from them. If you knew Mr. Masam, he is probably right. There doesn’t seem to be anything that could bother him, yet he is still fairly productive everyday (compared to other Africans). I really enjoy his company.

I personally also enjoyed the visit to his house because he wanted me to assess his youngest daughter, Aichi, who has been diagnosed as a “slow learner.” She is absolutely lovely. When she was 3 years old, she suffered from seizures and acquired brain injury at that point in her life. Aichi is now 9 and doing pretty well in school, despite her injury’s. She is also on a very common medication to control seizures and has been seizure-free for 5 years  After learning laws and requirements to support all special needs students in the school systems in the United States, I was so sad that Aichi would receive none of those. Mr. Masam asked me the most difficult questions to answer as a speech pathologist including, “How long will she be a slow learner?” “When will she get better?” and “What can I do in the schools here?” At home, I could easily answer the last question; however, it was the most difficult question in Africa. I learned that there are only 3 types of special needs students in Tanzania which include the Blind, Deaf and Mentally Impaired. Therefore, she could receive no special services or attention with her diagnosis. If she did not complete a test on time, she could be penalized.

For dinner, we had chicken, cucumbers & tomatoes, avocado, bananas & rice. It was basically a feast. The 3 children walked us back to the main road as it was getting dark and we stayed in for the night…after stopping by the local shop to get some chocolate.

Moshi

2008-07-15T04:57:00.001-04:00

I’m going to try to write a super-fast update on my life here for the last week.

Last Tuesday, Mitch and I headed off to Moshi. It was the nicest mini-bus experience in Africa, thus far. Mitch and I actually had the 4 back seats to ourselves and our bags. There were not even attempts to cram others in. Samwell picked us up at the bus station and we dropped the bags off at the house before walking over to Mwereni School. It’s only a 10 minute walk from the host family – a nice change from the hour and a half commute via dala-dala I previously had in Arusha. We talked to the head master and some other teachers to discuss how we would be most useful for the next 3 weeks. Oh yeah, we were also served Ndizi Stew. Basically, it’s some hot beefy stuff and plantains. Not my favorite.

Friday - Picked up Belinda, Anika, Maaike, Rochelle, Michelle and Malerie from the Bus Station. Izzy also moved in with the host family. We walked to the Kilimanjaro Crane Hotel for dinner for the rest of the evening. My favorite parts were all the miscommunications between multiple English speakers because of the accents and different phrases we use.

Saturday - Started our hike to the falls again with Oscar and Penina. They are my new host brother and sister. It wasn’t near as muddy as last time, even though some people still took a few falls. Our dala-dala made it all the way up to the beginning of the hike which cut out over an hour from the last time we hiked it. I enjoyed the hike just as much the second time as I did the first and still think the scenery is beautiful. I never pictured Tanzania to look like this. At the falls, I thought I was in the Amazon. Especially because we saw Colobus monkey’s at the twin falls. The best part of the hike would not have happened without the help of Anika. She had taken a picture of a cow on the way to the falls. On the way back we passed by the hut of the owner’s of the cow who demanded that we pay them money. (This was translated by Oscar). She was ranting at us for a couple minutes and then we decided just to keep walking…fast. She followed us for about 10 minutes before she laid off. Later, we were sitting and enjoying (or not enjoying) banana beer. Much to my surprise, the old woman shows up at the same place. She could put our hiking skills to shame!

Saturday night – Salzburg Café & Glacier Bar with a treehouse

Sunday – Mosied around a painting market & ate at Chrisberger’s before the girls went back to Arusha

Monday – Back at school. I am scheduled to teach English and P.E. classes and Mitch teaches Math and P.E. When I write P.E., I mean watching 75% of the students play Soccer and having the other 25% (all girls) playing with my hair and asking about my freckles. I have really enjoyed working with all ages. In Arusha, I loved the little ones and watching how they interacted. This is definitely a different experience because they are older, but it’s just as much fun. It is so fun to analyze their personalities as they interact.

Monday night – I played Go-Fish with Penina and Irene (both 11years old). I made them play it with me in Swahili so I could practice my numbers and learn 2 new words –“Neimda Semaki!”

Video Update

2008-07-14T15:55:00.003-04:00

This is video footage I shot while Megan and I rode the bus from Dar Es Salaam to Arusha. Near Moshi, we were able to get our first view of Mt. Kilimanjaro. I looked forward to hiking this with Megan and her family, but unfortunately won't be able to do so. I'm expecting to hear an amazing story about the Courtney Family's summit, however, pictures included.

This video footage was shot as we rode on the bus past Mt. Kilimanjaro on our way from Dar Es Salaam to Arusha. After nearly 8 hours on the bus, it began to break down near Moshi, extending our trip by an additional 4 hours. It was the longest bus ride Megan or I had ever been on.

Giving Thanks

2008-07-13T14:58:00.008-04:00

The Four M's: Michelle, Morgan, Megan, and Magnus. Our friend Texas Lindsey said it best when she said that tough times breed strong friendships. The four of us worked diligently at the orphanage and became the best of friends. It's a group of people I will forever call family and plan on traveling around the world to visit and volunteer with. Knock, knock.... knock.

Besides Megan, my other roomate in the hostel was Morgan. The three of us were very compatible roomates and fed off each other's energy. Here, Morgan and I ham it up with the glasses we found while sorting clothes.

Mitch and Jake, friends from Wisconsin, were great travel companions for Megan and I. Here, Megan and Mitch pose near one of the twin waterfalls during our hike in Moshi.

My dear, Esuphat, always ready with a beautiful smile and warm hug.

Despite all of the frustrations and difficulties Megan and I endured in Arusha, I had a really great time. Each day, after I finished journaling, I made an attempt to write down the things I was thankful for. The following is my complete list of things I was thankful for while in Tanzania (written directly as I wrote it in my journal.... in order from arrival to departure):

*Dad's sleeping bag.

*E-mails from home.

*My health.

*Y. helping Megan and I with our cell phones.

*Drinking Propel.

*The boys walking behind us in town.

*Yummy fish dinner.

*Healthy!

*Internet and phone card time.

*Friendliness.

*Self-confidence.

*Overall friendliness of others.

*Subsiding homesickness.

*Good food.

*Beautiful beach and weather.

*Friendly conversations with Pastor and his Kenyan guests.

*A comfortable bed and good night's sleep.

*Calls from Evan.

*Pastor's family's love and support.

*Bob and Mr. Courtney's help in dealing with the volunteer program.
*VPGC's support.

*Hot shower and a good meal for dinner.

*Evan's love.

*Chocolate.

*Friendly roomates.

*Sunny weather.

*Internet cafe that allowed me to post pictures.

*Video of the kids singing.

*Evan's continued growth and independence.

*Beautiful weather.--- Being able to see Mt. Meru.

*Hugs from Esuphat.

*Friendly conversations with friends in the evening.

*Good food for lunch at the Cinema.

*Getting to work intently with the kids.

*The sun coming out and the temperature warming up.

*Jake and Mitch's companionship.

*Good hiking gear.

*This opportunity.

*Beauty in nature.

*3 1/2 hour nap.

*Cipro!!

*Diarrhea being gone.

*Caring friends.

*Evan's laughter.

*Great, funny friends.

*My health.

*Evan's phone calls.

*Megan, Morgan, and Magnus.

*Snacks.

*My health.

*Hugs from the kids.

*Time to read my book.

*Phone call from Evan yesterday.

*Avocados.

*Friends.

*Evan.

Plain rice for Megan.

2008-07-12T13:20:00.002-04:00

Plain rice for Megan., originally uploaded by michelletschannen.

I've added pictures to our Flickr site. Click on the picture of Megan to view the other pictures.

Video Update

2008-07-12T11:30:00.006-04:00

This is video footage I shot while we were in Dar Es Salaam.

This is video footage I shot when Megan and I were at the beach in DES.

Timeline of Change

2008-07-10T08:29:00.002-04:00

The following is the timeline that lead to Megan and I's decision to change placements. I've attempted to write just the facts and leave my emotions for a new post. Keeping my emotions in check has been difficult. In the next few days and weeks I'll probably do a great deal of processing and crying. Luckily Evan's already been very supportive. :)

06/30/08:
*Morgan calls to tell us 3 kids at the hospital don't go to the orphanage school.. (We explicitly told the orphanage director we would only test the kids who attended the orphanage school, not every kid in the village.)
*Megan confronts the orphanage director on the issue of extra kids at the hospital.
*Kids at the hospital not given lunch, snacks, or water.

07/01/08:
*First group of kids must return to finish testing at hospital. Second group of parents and kids not told to stay home. Orphanage director blames the volunteers for not telling the parents.
*No snack or water for the kids at the hospital.

0702/08:
*I pay $500 US for the Pre-Unit students (my class) to be tested.
*I pay $5 US for all of the Pre-Unit students' medications.
*Former volunteer, D., calls Pastor Harry to inform him she wants to "meet with her friends, Megan and Michelle."
*I am pulled aside by a young, white male who says he's a reporter for a Seattle newspaper and a friend of D.'s. He tells me they found our blog and would like to speak with Megan and I later about our frustrations at the orphanage. I agree to meet with them later at a coffee shop.
*Orphanage director's husband assaults a member of D.'s group outside the hospital while Megan and I are there with the kids.
*Megan, Magnus, Mitch, and I meet with D.'s group. We agree with their frustrations with the orphanage director and discuss what we've seen on the ground the past 5 weeks. We give D. our full support, but explain that we're concerned about our safety. She tells us to finish the testing we're doing at the hospital, "because it's great work you're doing for the kids," and just to play dumb with the orphanage personnel. She reminds us to be conscious of our safety. D. tells us there's going to be a village meeting on Saturday about the situation at hand, but that we shouldn't come due to safety concerns.
*I develop a migraine.

07/03/08:
*I develop a sore throat and a runny nose. Run a 100* F fever at night.
*I go to the hospital for the second round of testing on the Pre-Unit students.
*No snacks or water for the kids at the hospital.

07/04/08:
*I have a sore throat, am congested, and run a 101* F fever at night.
*I don't go to the hospital because I'm not feeling well.
*Megan says there are approximately 10 kids in group 3 who don't go to school.
*Megan and Belinda pay for 30 kids' meds from the past week. Give to Pastor to hand out.
*No snacks or water for the kids at the hospital.
*D. calls to say that the orphanage director and her husband were arrested on four charges:
1. land issues
2. fraud
3. immigration
4. assault

07/05/08:
*D. and group attend village meeting with village chief and community members.
*Megan and I receive text messages from Pastor saying we need to meet with ASAP and not to trust anyone because someone is trying to get us.
*Megan and I meet with Pastor and found out that the man from the international orphans program (whom I originally thought was amazing and really legit) wants to have Megan, Belinda, and I deported because we're on the wrong visa. Our volunteer program has us register under a tourist visa and not the volunteer visa. Pastor claims he can help us because he has a friend who works in immigration.
*Megan and I e-mail the director of our volunteer program about our concerns and fears.
*Megan and I call our parents to discuss the situation. I contemplate leaving.
*I am still sick with a 100* F fever and congestion. I begin to develop a cough.

07/06/08:
*Megan goes on a walking safari in Arusha National Park with other volunteers.
*I go to AICC Hospital with our VPGC. Discuss the difficulties at the orphanage with the VPGC. The VPGC finally agrees with us and our frustrations. He apologizes for disregarding our opinions earlier in the summer and asks what he can do to help support us. My malaria test comes back negative and I'm diagnosed with a chest cold. I am put on two antibiotics.
*D. calls saying the orphanage director and her husband were bailed out of jail for $40,000 US by the international orphans foundation guy. The orphanage director and her husband have been banned from the village and must be out by Wednesday, 07/09/08. D. informs us the meeting went well and there was strong community support for her groups cause. She informs us that the international orphans foundation guy stole money from us by telling us that we had to pay for the HIV testing and for the medical care of kids 5 and under. Both are free in TZ. D. asks if Megan or I would be willing to testify in court on Tuesday. I tell her I need to discuss this with Megan.
*Discuss testifying in court with Megan. We both agree not to testify and that we'd prefer to do everything when we were back and safe in the US.
*I decide that I'm too worn down by the stress of the situation at the orphanage and am not mentally, emotionally, or physically strong enough to stay in TZ. Megan decides she is and wants to move to a different placement, outside of Arusha, to protect her safety.
*I call home to arrange my flights.

07/07/08:
*Megan and I pack.
*Megan decides which city she plans on relocating to.
*D. informs us that without our testimony, we can't prosecute the international orphans foundation guy. We inform her that we'll give her all of our documentation once Megan is in the US. We tell D. we are in full support of the work she's doing to bring down the orphanage and advocate for the kids.

07/08/08:
*I fly home.
*Megan moves placements.

Longest flight ever

2008-07-09T07:37:00.001-04:00

That thirteen hour flight from dubai is horribly long. Watched my favorite new movie, juno, and a classic episode of the office. I'm hoping my lost box of donations made it's way back to jfk (last I heard it was enroute to dubai) and I can pick it up today on my way to dc. I miss megan's company.

Times are changing

2008-07-07T08:55:00.002-04:00

I don't have much time to post today. There's been major drama over the past week, thus the need to go private and the lack of updates. Police have been involved at the orphanage. I have a bad chest cold from the stress. Megan and I are leaving Arusha to protect our safety. When I'm back in the States, I'll update everyone. At the moment, we're both safe and doing well.

The Good Things

2008-07-03T02:38:00.004-04:00

I know that I (Megan) have not updated the blog in a long time and wanted to share the number of fun, uplifting, exciting things that have been going on. I prefer to write in list form. I don't do paragraphs unless it's mandatory, so here goes;
The things I like most
+Clinton. I know he is not the brightest crayon in the box (and by that I mean that he needs individual support academically in all subjects) however, he is can melt my heart away. The other day at the hospital I was carrying a big sack with chocolates, my fleece etc. Little Clinton ran by side to help me carry the bag. I'm always slightly skeptical of some of the kids intentions. Do they want to take something in my bag? Candy and other belongings are hard to resist if they find the opportunity to take it. I let Clinton take the sack knowing the things in the bag were of little value to me and let him run with it - keeping a close eye. From a distance, I saw him take the sack over to the hospital pavillion and put it exactly where I had placed my bag yesterday. First of all, I thought it was amazing he remembered where I kept my belongings the previous day. On top of that, he did not even attempt to look inside, he wanted nothing more than to help me.
+My friends. With the endless amounts of challenges, I have really enjoyed meeting and working with so many people. I love travelling and to make it even better, I like to meet people when I travel. I have worked with people from America, New Zealand, Australia, England, Ireland, Switzerland, Holland and still have 3 1/2 more weeks left. I love talking to them and hearing their travel and life experiences. When there's lots of sitting around and waiting on African time, I am so lucky that I have great people to share that time with.
+My travel companion. Oh, Michelle. Yesterday, a thought occured to me. We have not both been sick or feeling icky at the same time. (I hope I didn't just jinx us). Two days ago my throat hurt, I felt feverish and just downright exhausted. Michelle was at the top of her game taking care of the children in the hospital. Yesterday, Michelle had a migraine and lights out at 8pm while my throat didn't hurt for the first time in 4 days. I think it's a sign we are good travelling companions. One of us is always feeling good and thinking clearly :)
+This opportunity.
+Bottled Water.
+Chocolate that is good in any country.
+Support and postive comments from all of our loved ones back home.

Saving Lives

2008-07-02T09:58:00.002-04:00

With a restless sleep last night, I awoke this morning to meet my Pre-unit students at Mt. Meru Hospital. I didn't sleep well last night as I was very anxious about determining my students' health status. I tossed and turned all night, dreaming horrible dreams about the kids I've fallen in love with. Luckily, today was nothing like the nightmares I had.

Magnus and I were the first to arrive at the hospital today. Our job was to meet the dalla-dallas from the Village and welcome the children and their parents to the hospital. After sitting around chatting for 30 minutes, the dalla-dallas arrived. Watching 22 kids and various guardians unload from 2 dalla-dallas (the size of a mini-van) was quite amusing. My pre-unit students were estatic to see me and ran with open arms towards me shouting, "Teacher Michelle! Mambo!" A few parents, older siblings, and grandparents shook my hand as well. Magnus and I followed the orphanage director's husband into the hospital with at least 5 or 6 kids on our arms.

The first test the children were receiving was for HIV. Magnus had crowd control in the hallway and I sat in the examining room. In the Village, HIV/AIDS doesn't "exist." There is a huge stigma related to the disorder and parents all signed a waiver stating they didn't want to be present for the HIV testing and didn't want to know the diagnosis. My role in the examining room was to be the stand-in parent. The orphanage director's husband, J., brought the children into the room in pairs. I sat on a chair and left my arms and lap open for comfort. Each kid was different in the amount of comfort they wanted. Some strolled in with big grins on their face. Other wanted my arms wrapped tightly around their little bodies. Some wanted only to hold a few of my fingers. The most scared children came in crying and wrapped their entire bodies around mine while sobbing. Luckily we only had 4 children like that. The HIV test itself was very simple-- a pin prick on the finger to draw blood and it was finished. We hit the jackpot today as NO ONE TESTED POSITIVE! :)

After the HIV test, we hearded the kids and their guardians to the bathroom and adjacent waiting area. Guardians were then required to assist in obtaining stool and urine samples from their children. This was a VERY lengthy process as there were only 2 bathroom stalls available. I also think this was complicated by the fact that the children eat and drink very little and most likely produce very little urine or stool. After the samples were all collected, they were sent to the lab for examination.

The third test completed today was drawing blood to test for malaria and other various blood related disorders. Another volunteer, who's a lab tech in Europe, sat with the children during this test. This was the lengthiest test as the children were already weary of the doctors and many of them were very scared. The kids went in pairs again, unaccompanied by their guardians. It was neat to see the children supporting one another. Often times the pairs of children went in together holding hands and came out with their arms around one another. Those who had finished the test spoke in Kiswahili to the others. I assume they were informing them of the procedure as they were pointing at their forearms and were saying, "kidgo pain" (little pain).

Before our final test of the day, vision, Megan made it to the hospital with bananas and cups. Magnus and I went and purchased 5 bottles of maji (water) and proceeded to give each kid a cup of water and a banana. They were estatic to receive these snacks and ate with gusto. I love feeding these kids as they're often times very hungry, but they also have incredible manners. They're always saying "Thank you, Teacher." and are very conscious about sharing. A few times I caught kids giving their friends a sip of their water or a bite of their banana.

The final test was for vision and wasn't worth our time. It was poorly run and every child came back with normal vision, despite being told by J. that a handful of children were having difficulty reading the chalkboard at school. We've decided to disregard the results of this test as the screening wasn't done properly.

Lunch went well, with each of the kids receiving a plate of pilau (rice with stew) and a cup of water. Once again they ate with incredible manners, patience, and kindness. These kids may not have all of the comforts of Western children and may miss out on some of the great aspects of childhood, but they are the most gracious, kind-hearted, and friendly children I've ever met. Watching them eat their meals and chat with their friends has quickly become my favorite activity.

The day ended with 3 children and their guardians getting the chance to see the general physician and have a physical and counseling session with his team. Only 3 children were able to see the physicians team as the lab was backed up and couldn't produce all of the kids' test results. The remaining children will be seen by the physician's team tomorrow. Brining these children to the hospital today was the best thing we've done since arriving in Tanzania. One of our students, who had appeared lethargic and feverish all day, was diagnosed with urgent malaria and a very high fever. He was immediately put on an anti-malarial medication. The physician informed us that his case of malaria was life-threatening. Knowing that if left untreated malaria is fatal, we realize that we may have saved this little boy's life today. The physician administered the first dose of the perscription at the hospital and informed the mother and us how often he needed to take it and the amount of rest he needed to receive. We were also informed that one of our students had worms and we were able to purchase the appropriate perscription for her as well.

I'm excited to come back to the hospital tomorrow to watch my students interact with their parents and one another. I'm very hopeful that our students will receive the medical treatment they deserve and believe that we'll be able to assist them in obtaining the medication they need.

Rainbow in the Storm

2008-06-30T09:42:00.002-04:00

Another Monday, more drama surrounding the orphanage. We began the day hopeful that the kids in the baby class (kids 3-5) were going to be having their first round of testing completed at the local hospital. Megan, Magnus, Morgan, and I split into pairs, with Morgan and Magnus heading to the hospital and Megan and I to the Village. On our way to the Village, Megan and I received a call from Morgan informing us that there were a handful of kids who had arrived at the hospital that she didn't know. This was immediately a problem as we had explicitly told the orphanage director and the representative from the hospital that we only had enough funds to test the children who attend the orphanage school, not every child in the Village. We told Morgan to take a headcount and call us back with the number of kids who did not attend the orphanage school. Minutes later we received the news that 3 students who arrived at the hospital did not attend the orphanage school. Megan and I were thus left with the task of confronting the orphanage director on this error.

I'm not a confrontational person and have a tendency to allow people to walk all over me. Despite being very upset and frustrated with the orphanage director, I knew I didn't have it within me to deal with the orphanage director. The task would have to be left up to Megan. When we arrived at school, the kids were playing around and we were notified by our teacher that the kisd would not be having school today as there was going to be a visitor. After the orphanage director greeted us, Megan immediately began questioning her about the extra children at the hospital. She reminded her that we could only pay for the children who attend the orphanage school and asked why there were extra children at the hospital. The orphanage director's response was a look of shock and denied having anything to do with the situation. She placed all of the blame on the secretary, even while Megan reminded her that she had attended the intital meeting where the doctor was present and where it was made known that we would only pay for the children at the school to be tested.

I was really proud of Megan for standing up for us and the children. To ensure that no extra children would be snuck in later in the week, we created a master list of all the children who should be tested. Thinking we were out of the woods, we proceeded to play with the kids. Nearly 20 minutes after Megan's initial confrontation, an older student came to me saying that the orphanage director had requested my presence. I nearly fainted. I'm being brutally honest when I say I don't do confrontation and conflict. I bit the bullet, though, and headed to the orphanage director's hut. The meeting was brief and included one of the new volunteers from Europe. The orphanage director played completely dumb with me and asked me what was going on. I informed her that we were frustrated with hearing different things from different people and not having our requests respected as volunteers. I probably wasn't the best advocate for us, but I let her know that we didn't appreciate having things happen behind our backs as we were being transparent with her and wanted the same from her. She simply nodded and smiled as if there weren't any difficulties at all.

After the meeting, Megan and I stood around playing with the kids until a huge coach bus arrived. This is an incredible feat as the Village is incredibly rural and has very narrow paths. How this bus made it to the school is beyond my imagination. At the sight of it, the kids began screaming and shouting as if they were meeting Santa for the first time. Inside the bus were our guests-- 8 white women from Virginia who were on a missionary trip. Missionary trips are totally not my thing and I knew I was in for an experience when I saw their t-shirts ("born to serve") and heard that Megan was greeted with the phrase, "May God Bless you." A pastor from the Village ushered our kids into the one room schoolhouse and introduced our guests. For the next 45 minutes, the kids performed for our guests by singing and dancing to traditional Tazanian and Biblical songs. Megan and I snuck out when the guests began their Bible session by teaching the kids a lesson about being sinners and using the blood of Jesus to protect them from the bad deeds they do.

The orphanage director was nowhere to be found when we left and so we called Morgan and Magnus to check on the situation at the hospital. Morgan informed us that things were not going well at the hospital and that our help would be greatly appreciated. Megan and I bought some bananas in the Village and headed to Arusha. When we arrived at the hospital, Morgan informed us that we had not been given the adequate number of doctors and counselors that we had been guaranteed and for whom we had paid. She also told us that the kids had not eaten or drank anything all day (by this time it was 1:00 PM) and that the orphanage director had forgotten to send food or money for the kids.

Helping with the kids at the hospital was a surreal experience. On top of the corruption, poverty, and poor politics that are happening in Africa, the horrendous and unsanitary conditions at the best hospital in town make it evident why HIV/AIDS, malaria, and TB are ripping through this continent. The hallways and rooms were packed with people. There was no security anywhere. There was blood on the floor in certain areas. People roamed through the building freely, moaning and groaning, obviously in pain. Our poor children were obviously hungry and scared. When Megan and I arrived, they were finishing the HIV tests, which consists of a finger prick to draw blood. I led two children into the room to have their fingers pricked and each of them wept while gripping my body tightly. I nearly cried myself. We then moved to a different area of the hospital to have the kids' vision checked. I'm not sure how accurate this test was as all of the kids were in shock from the HIV test and many of them refused to talk to the doctor. Our little Baracka trembled as the doctor asked him to identify the letters.

Magnus was oru hero today as he bought all of the children two bananas each for a snack. The kids were so famished that they ate the bananas in less than a minute. At 2:00, the doctors decided they were finished for the day (urine, malaria, HIV, and eyes were the only tests completed today) and ushered us all out of the hospital. Having eaten nothing but bananas all day, the representative from an international orphans program (on-site at the hospital to assist us with logistics as he speaks fluent English and Kiswahili.... he's totally wonderful) bought each of the children a plate of pilau. We lined the kids up under a shelter on the hospital's premisis, had each of them use some hand sanitizer, and fed them their lunch. The shelter was absolutely quiet and the kids ate with wonderful manners and patience. Knowing they were probably dehydrated, Megan and I purchased abotu 10 bottles of water to pour into cups for them. They drank these in one big gulp.

After lunch we hung around for another hour waiting to hear when the remaining tests were to be completed. It was fun watching the kids horse around and interact with the few parents who were there (all kids had to be accompanied by a guardian.... the orphans' guardian is the orphanage director and her husband). By request of a few kids, we sang 5 Green and Speckled Frogs to a raptured parental audience. Magnus and Morgan were the tickle monsters. Megan passed her sunglasses around to her adoring fans, Clinton and Freddy. I managed the entrance to the shelter and the choo. It was a spectacular end to a crazy day.

Before leaving this evening, we were told that only one child tested positive for HIV today, Baracka (which we already knew). We also found out that one child had an eye infection. The remaining tests will be completed tomorrow at no additional cost to us since the doctors were slow today. We may not have had everything go as planned today at the hospital, but we're very happy the testing is happening. Tomorrow is another day and we hope things run smoothly and that our children remain healthy.

Tanzanian Church

2008-06-29T10:29:00.004-04:00

Pastor, H, Mama, Michelle, P., and Megan after church today.

By invitation of Pastor and his family, we attended the morning protion of Pastor's church today. I would not consider myself a very religious person and do not attend church, so I was a tad weary of attending a Protestant church service in Tanzania. I wanted to be respectful of Pastor's beliefs, though, and show my support for the work he does, so I woke early for the 1 1/2 hour dalla-dalla drive to the Village. Megan, Morgan, and I were expecting the dalla-dalla drive to be smooth sailing this morning as it's Sunday and much of Arusha closes down on Sunday's. We were incredibly wrong. There wasn't much traffic today to slow us down, there just weren't very many dalla-dalla's traveling to the Village. What is usually a 5 minute dalla-dalla transfer in Arusha turned into 30 minutes today. Finally, already a half-hour late, we arrived in the Village.

Pastor met us at his favorite tailor shop and walked us to his church. The church is nestled deep within the Village and has a beautiful view of Mt. Meru. As we walked up to the church we could hear the villagers singing a beautiful song in Kiswahili. We were escorted in by an older female villager and shown to a bench on the right side of the church. The Village church is a large log cabin-esque building with a tin roof. Sunlight and the breeze constantly filter through.

The full church serivce at Pastor's church typically lasts 8 hours (from 10-6), but we told Pastor we could only stay from 10-12. The portion of the service we sat through was very unique. Mama and Pastor sat at the front of the church on the left with another Kenyan, female pastor. Pastor's daughter, P., and her cousin, H. sat with a handful of kids on the left side of the church. There was a great deal of singing and dancing, all lead by the older children, including H. When we walked in I didn't even notice H. leading the singing at the front of the church as she looked so grown up in her red top and skirt. Once Megan pointed her out to me and I smiled at her, she grinned a huge grin back at me. Along with the singing and dancing, there were large chunks of time devoted to prayer chanting. This was a little uncomfortable for me, but I bowed my head and listened intently.

The portion of the sermon we heard was led by the Kenyan pastor. Her preaching style was very passionate and loud. She requested a great deal of Amen's and Halleluiah's, which the villagers willingly gave her. I couldn't follow her sermon as it was primarily spoken in Kiswahili with the occasional English. She did mention pregnant women a lot and appeared to be reading a story about Samson. I did pick up on her request that people disregard the people in your life who bring you down and that you should forget about yesterday as it's dead and won't be coming back ever again.

When we left, Mama invited us for lunch on Tuesday. The plan is to come for lunch and to see the updates on the house. It'll be exciting to see how much progress has been made.

Picture Update

2008-06-28T10:53:00.004-04:00

Our students with the masks they created on Thursday.

Megan and I at the Arusha Coffee Plantation.

ICTR Update

2008-06-28T10:26:00.004-04:00

I'm sitting at the Impala Hotel in Arusha for an hour while Megan, Morgan, and Lindsey talk to a Tanzanite dealer about pruchasing some Tanzanite. While I wait around, I thought I'd find more information regarding the International Criminal Tribunal for Rwanda court proceedings we witnessed yesterday. If you go to the following link, you can see all of the court reports for the case we sat in on: Nsengimana Case.

A brief synopsis of this case:
Former Vice-Chancellor of the Christ the King College of Nyanza, Priest Hormisdas Nsengimana, a Hutu, is being tried for genocide and crimes against humanit. Nsengimana has pleaded not guilty. Pastor Nsengimana is accused of having killed a Tutsi priest and seven women from the same ethnic group in Southern Rwanda. Ït is believed that Nsengimana, a Hutu extremist, wanted to exterminate the Tutsis. Before the genocide in 1994, Nsengimana did not hide his hatred for the Tutsis, including his own students, fellow priests, and other employees. He has been quoted as saying (at the time of the genocide), "time is over where churches are to be used as refuge for Tutsis." He was also allegedly the spiritual leader of the group "the Dragons" or "the Death Squad." The members of this group were very active during the genocide in the town of Nyanza. Nsengimana is also believed to have said, "When my rifle kills five people, I feel rested."

The witness we heard speak yesterday was a former teacher at Christ the King College and appeared to have been a Hutu supporter. At the time of the 1994 genocide, she was living in an all women's hostel across the street from the university. The prosecutor questioned her on whether she knew about various people, many of who she claimed to know if, but not have any further details. The prosector also asked her about her knowledge of 60 displaced students who stayed at the university of Easter break. Again, she claimed to no nothing about these students, even when a letter (written by Nsengimana) was read aloud to her that specifically stated there were 60 displaced students staying at the university over Easter break. Another large part of the court hearing we heard dealt with questioning this witness on her knowledge of a roadblock placed in front of her hostel. It is alleged that Nsengimana requested this roadblock, and a few others, be placed near the university to catch all Tutsis who were using that road. Once again, the witness claimed to no nothing about the roadblock, even stating to the prosecutor, "I don't understand why you're so obsessed with this roadblock. I don't have any knowledge about a roadblock in front of our hostel." The last portion of the court proceedings we heard dealt with the prosecutor questioning the witness about a pathway near her hostel that lead to the university. It is alleged that this is where Nsengimana murdered a Tutsi priest.

Human Rights

2008-06-27T10:25:00.003-04:00

Re-evaluating our expectations of this trip has allowed Megan and I to redetermine our purpose here. We continue to be frustrated with the lack of support we're receiving and the actions that are taking place at the orphanage, but we've decided that our purpose now is to teach when we can and to document everything else. For the past two nights, when we've come home, we pull out our avocados, bananas, and oranges (bought from two of our students' older sister in the market inthe Village), cheese (imported from Holland), and peanut butter and have a tea time in our bed room as we document the events of the day. When we're at the orphanage we're respectful of the orphanage director's authority and focus all of attention on the kids. We're "free" (open and transparent) with the orphanage director about anything we do (taking Onesmos to the hospital, offerring to pay to have all of the kids tested for HIV, etc) and are giving 110% to our students. While we're working with the kids, though, we tuck in our heads the events that happen which don't settle well with us: no food being served to the kids for lunch, teachers not coming to school, a teacher hitting children in the head, etc. Our hope is to be able to appropriately advocate for these children when we arrive home.

In good news, we've been given permission, after a long discussion with the orphanage director, to have all 85 of the students at the orphanage school to be tested for HIV, TB, and Malaria and to also have a full general physical. This will cost $180 a day for each doctor and and additional $8 per child. The American doctor who will be leading the team of physicians we'll be working with believes we can get this accomplished in 1 week. We start on Monday by taking the baby class (3 and 4 year olds). Children with parents will be accompanied by at least one of their parents. Orphaned children will be accompanied by a volunteer. We're still in need $400. If you're interested in donating to this project, please e-mail or comment. Once we have all of the children tested, the plan is to work with an international orphans NGO (I forget which one, a representative came and spoke with us on Wednesday) to sign the children up for various programs that will allow them access to free or discounted medicine.

Today we missed out on school to attend a session of the Rwandan Genocide Tribunal trials being held by the UN. These trials have been taking place for the past 6 years and are held here in Arusha. Many of the court proceedings are open to the public for free. Anyone with a valid passport can come to the AICC building in Arusha and sit in a room with headphones and listen to the court case as it takes place. The trials take place in multiple languages (French, English, Swahili, etc) thus the need for headphones with translation. Today we heard the testimony of a female witness who appeared to have information about a group of Hutus who murdered 6 Tutsis and a Tutsi pastor in 1994. We only saw the cross examination of this woman as her earlier testimony was held in a closed session. For 3 hours we listened as this woman tried to defend the Hutus she knew as a professor at a college in Rwanda. From the looks of the judges and lawyers faces, as well as the tone of their voices, this woman didn't seem to be very compliant. From what we could gather, she held a great deal of information about these Hutu men, but wasn't being cooperative in sharing this incriminating information.

Moment of the day:
* On Thursday Megan and I had our students decorate paper masks. After each child had decorated their mask, they placed them over their face and played "Heads up 7 Up." They picked up on the game surprisingly well and quickly began to cheat, which is very typical of American students. The grins on their faces during the game were priceless!

Picture Update

2008-06-25T09:15:00.010-04:00

Magnus and Barracka on their way to Barrack's house. These two have become an inseparable pair, with Barracka searching for Magnus whenever he's scared or upset.

Our students eating lunch yesterday. Lunch, which sometimes isn't served, was ugali (mashed cassava) and shredded fish. The kids typically scarf down their meals and beg each other for any left over scaps.

While sorting through clothing at the other project, Megan and I attempted to make light of the situation. This is not the project we paid to participate in, but appears to be where the orphanage director wants us to spend the next 4 weeks.

Our hiking group. From left to right: Michelle, Mitch, Jake, Luke, and Jeff. We LOVED hiking with these boys and felt a great sense of camaraderie with them as we were all in friendship pairs. Check out the mud on our legs. At one point, Jeff and I were crawling on all fours up a steep, muddy slope. The chant from the others was, "Who will make it up first?!"

Megan and I at the twin waterfalls in Kilimanjaro National Park. We got close enough to feel their spray and to dip or hands into the cool water.

Megan and I at the first waterfall in Kilimanjaro National Park.

Another day, more annoyances. Things continue to be awkward at the orphanage. The orphanage director is very cold towards Megan, Magnus, Morgan, and I, while being very chummy and friendly with the three new volunteers. While playing with the kids today, a new volunteer asked Megan if she thought the orphanage director was trying to befriend the new volunteers because they're naive to the realities of the financial situation at the orphanage. Megan couldn't have agreed more. We've been put into a really bad place at the orphanage and are obviously not welcome by the orphanage director.

Morgan and Magnus met Pastor in the Village this morning to purchase the windows, cement blocks, and bags of cement for his new house. A big thank you goes out to everyone who donated me money. So far, I have spent $500 assisting Pastor pay to rebuild his house. I will have exact totals tomorrow for what was purchased. Today I spent another $370 of my own money to help pay for the windows. I'm hoping my uncle will come through and have his company (Central State Windows) donate the money for the cost of the windows. While in the Village, Pastor informed Morgan and Margnus that he would no longer be working at the orphanage. He feels frustrated by the situation there and doesn't want to spend the rest of his life fighting her over how to run the orphanage. He was unclear, however, on when he would stop working there.

While preparing for class to start, our teacher (the wonderful teacher Megan and I work with... who was the only teacher that showed up to school today) pulled Megan aside to tell her that she was very sad. She quickly left and Morgan walked into the room with the news that Pastor was leaving and that he thought our teacher might be leaving as well. After our teacher pulled both Megan and I aside later in the day to say we needed to have an important talk tomorrow, we can only assume that she's in support of Pastor and will also be leaving the orphanage.

Knowing that the two people we trusted and fully supported at the orphanage are potentially leaving the organization is really frustrating and disappointing. With 4 more weeks left at the orphanage, Megan and I are in a precarious situation. On the one hand, we don't want to support a corrupt program and continue to work in a situation where we aren't wanted or appreciated. On the other hand, we want to continue teaching our students as we've completely fallen for them and they're starting to show some improvement. We have a meeting on Friday to attend regarding our "positions at the other project." We do not want to be spending the rest of our time at the other project, but both the orphanage director and our VPGC seem to believe this is the best use of our time. We continue to be frustrated with the utter lack of support we're receiving here in Arusha and the fact that we always seem to be in trouble.

In good news, Megan and I taught today! :) Our students continue to enjoy writing in their "All About Me" books. Today they wrote about who their friends were and what they liked to do. It broke my heart when none of them cold think of something they liked to do with their friends, even when it was explained to them in Kiswahili. These kids are missing out on the pleasures of childhood. While we taught, Morgan and Magnus were able to take Onesmus, a 4 year old child, to the hospital to get a sever skin infection examined. Without their help, he never would've seen a doctor as he's a double orphan who lives with 7 siblings, including his pregnant 19 year-old sister, and the orphanage director felt medical attention wasn't necessary. He was put on two antibiotic pills and a cream. We had his head shaved and have all been using gloves when we're around him. Megan, Magnus, and I also got to do our first home visit. We stopped by Barracka's (6 years old) house to meet his mother. Barracka is the only known HIV+ child at Jane's and lives with his 22 year-old HIV+ mother. The father has never been in the picture and Mama Barracka struggles to make ends meet. She dreams of owning a salon someday, but doesn't have the means to buy all of the supplies and pay to rent a facility. Magnus brought a bag of apples, a jump rope, a box of matchbox cars, and 20,000 shillings for Mama Barracka. Both Barracka and his mother were very appreciative. Megan and I are planning on visiting Mama Barracka in a few weeks to have her braid our hair. We plan on paying her 15,000 shillings each, more than she makes in a month.

Health Update

2008-06-24T09:14:00.003-04:00

** The Cipro. totally helped kick out my diarrhea. Since being in TZ, I've brushed my teeth with bottled water, drank only bottled water, and have avoided eating any produce that isn't boiled, peeled, or piping hot. I'm also constantly walking around with socks and shoes on, unless I have my chocos on. Thanks for all of the concerns! :)

Politics

2008-06-24T08:39:00.003-04:00

Many would agree that I enjoy a good political discussion here and there when I'm in the States. While here in Africa, however, I've tried to avoid any discussions pertaining to American politics in order to keep myself safe. I have on occasion shared the Obama love (having a Kenyan father makes Obama incredibly popular here in East Africa) with a few of Pastor's friends, but other than that I've kept mum on my liberal stances. Unfortunately, I can't seem to avoid the politics at the orphanage. Despite my greatest attempts to stay out of the political drama that is enfolding within the orphanage, I always seem to get sucked in. Today was no different.

Without going into too much detail, for awhile now, there have been financial difficulties at the orphanage. This seems to be a common problem across Tanzania. The financial difficulties at the orphanage, however, has a direct impact on the children being served as well as volunteers who donate their time and money. The lack of food for the children, the postponed building of the orphanage center, and the complete lack of resources despite a constant flow of donation money is an obvious red flag. Megan and I have been informed of the financial problems by a few volunteers who have been frustrated with the situation. Pastor has also given us his side of the argument. During our initial, awkward meeting with the orphanage director, she was immediately on the defensive with us and attempted to lay some ground rules down for us in regards to donating items, including money. We were essentially told that everything had to go to the kids, whether our donors (Mama Bertucci, the Mayer family, my parents, etc) had specified a certain project or not. This put me on edge as I believe that the only person I'm responsible to for donations is the person who donated the item. While in this meeting, Megan spoke up and informed the orphanage director that she felt we were the wrong people she needed to address as the specific situation she was referring to did not involve us. Unfortuantely the orphanage director continued to discuss the issue with us along with other political issues they're dealing with within the orphanage.

Since that meeting, we've been trying to lay low by focusing our attention on teaching the kids while they're at school and using our free time (with the orphanage director's approval) to assist Pastor in building his house. We thought we were out of the woods last week as things went really well in the classroom, but I guess good times can't last forever. Yesterday while walking to the dalla-dalla stop, we received a call from Belinda, another volunteer, telling us that the orphanage director didn't want us coming to the orphanage, rather we were to go and sort through clothing at another project. We complied and assissted in packaging 30 boxes for families in the area. It was a quick job, but it had to be done. When we left, the director of the program asked Megan and Belinda to come back the next day (today) to help deliver the boxes. They both agreed.

Last night as I was planning for today's school lessons, Morgan (a volunteer we room with), was pulled aside by our VPGC. He informed her that he had spoken to the orphanage director and that she did not want us (Megan, Magnus, Morgan, and I) coming to the orphanage the next day (today) because we would be utilized better at the other project. Morgan informed our VPGC that she didn't sign up to work at the other project and that she wanted to go and teach the kids. Paraphrasing Morgan, our VPGC told her that we need to stop trying so hard to always be fixing something and that sometimes you just need to do nothing.

When Morgan informed us of this conversation, as she was asked to do so by our VPGC (don't ask me why he refuses to talk to us as a group), we all became very upset. We knew that just yesterday (Monday) a new group of 3 volunteers had arrived to work at the orphanage and were living in our host families homes, a mere week after we were pulled for financial reasons. Our interpretation of the orphanage director's desire to keep us from coming to the orphanage was that she didn't want us talking to the other volunteers about our frustrations and that it was easier to just push us out. Knowing how much I had invested in my classroom, I made the decision last night to go into school today.

Going against the grain and facing confrontation head on is not my strong suit. Thus, making the decision to go to school today wasn't easy. I had nightmares all night, made obvious by my tangle of sleeping bag, stuffies, and blanket. I awoke this morning by myself and headed off to the Village, an hour and a half trip. Simply making it to the Village alone in one piece was a huge accomplishment. I was harrassed on the dulla-dulla when the driver wouldn't give me back the correct amount of change, but I stood my ground until he paid me. I was repeatedly called Mzungu (typically a racist term for white person), yet I ignored each call. I was definitely worried about the orphanage director's reaction when I turned the corner at the school.

When I arrived at school, it was raining and no one was there except for Pastor and a handful of children. I collected the supplies I needed and went into the classroom to play with the kids. The teachers arrived an hour later (already an hour later for school) as did the new volunteers and the orphanage director. I taught for 2 hours before break time. During break time I had tea with the other volunteers and saw the orphanage director. She was not pleased to see me. She tends to be very passive aggressive and simply said to me, "Why didn't you go to the other project?" I informed her that I was here for the kids (her words from our first meeting) and that I didn't want to leave their teacher without the lesson plans I assured her I would have. The orphanage director scoffed at me and left the room.

For the 45 minute break a man from an international orphans program discussed the ways in which his program is going to assist the orphanage in becoming a more reputable program. Everything he said was wonderful, but it just felt as if it was arriving 10 minutes too late. Elsa, a volunteer who's been here for 10 weeks and leaves on Monday, asked all of the hard questions as she's been dealing with the difficulties at the orphanage much longer than the rest. The man was very helpful, yet the orphanage director continued to be icy to Elsa and I. After the meeting, Elsa and I went back to our class and finished teaching for the day. I meant to talk to the orphanage director one on one to ask her about the other project situation (supposedly there's going to be a meeting on Friday about our position at the other project), but she had left early.

I do NOT want to be involved in the politics at the orphanage and don't want to spend the next 5 weeks working at the other project. I also don't want to spend 5 weeks feeling like I'm constantly walking on egg shells regarding the teaching I want to do. I came here to assist the children at the orphanage and would like to continue doing that until Megan's parents arrive at the end of July. If the orphanage director is going to be cold towards me and continue to make it difficult for me to teach my class and work with our teacher (the WONDERFUL Tanzanian teacher of my class), I'm going to be very physically and emotionally drained. I'm also frustrated with the lack of support from our VPGC. He seems to believe that the orphanage director can do no wrong and can't seem to understand why we're frustrated with the situation at the orphanage. All in all, it's making for a very frustrating and annoying trip.

The More Boys I Meet (the more I love my dog)

2008-06-24T07:33:00.006-04:00

No, I do not have a dog. Yes, I did use the title of a Carrie Underwood song for my blog title. The longer I am in Africa the more I am cheated for money or asked for money or personal belongings by African men. It's safe to say that white women are an easy target. For example, the dala-dala ride cost 100 shillings extra just to get to the internet cafe because we were white. The man collecting the money wouldn't stop laughing even as we continued to hold our hands out to receive our appropriate change that we never got. It was only the equivalent of appx. 8 cents - but when people try to cheat you everyday, it gets old fast.

My day started when Michelle quickly exited the hostel to teach the kids at school. I was so proud of her for not letting the politics of everything get in the way. We'll see what's to come of that. I waited for Belinda and we headed off to another project where we packed up boxes of donations to take to an orphanage. It wasn't frustrating at all when we arrived and half of the boxes we had packed yesterday were un-packed. Nor was it frustrating when it took us 3 hours to deliver these boxes to an orphanage 20 minutes away. Did I mention the fact that the man in charge of delivering the donations asked me to pay for the "petrol?" Please refer to the title of the blog.

Once we arrived at the orphanage, things went smoothly. The orphanage was very, clean and organized (many of the things I have been missing about America). We took in the donation boxes and passed each children their own teddy bear. Danny and Stacie - I took a picture of the boy in his Purdue Sweatshirt. The kids, as always, were the best part of my day.

Picture Update

2008-06-23T06:41:00.004-04:00

Megan and I in hour 3 of our 7 hour hike in Kilimanjaro National Park.

Sweet, sweet Musa-Luca. His father is currently dying of AIDS and skin cancer. He is bed-ridden and will most likely die this summer. When completing a school project, Musa-Luca commented that he wanted to grow up and become a doctor. May all of his dreams come true.

sick

2008-06-23T06:26:00.003-04:00

I'm still dealing with the bad case of diarrhea. Unfortunately I have no idea what the cause is and thus can't avoid certain things. After attempting to control things with Pepto, I took out the big guns and took my first dose of Ciprofloxacin, the medicine percribed by Dr. G. for Traveller's Diarrhea. I took the pill about 2 hours ago and am still feeling the queasy stomach. I haven't felt the need to puke and am knocking on wood that it never happens. The plan for the rest of the day is to go back to the hostel to eat lunch and nap. If I'm not feeling better tomorrow, I'm going to take the day off and give my body time to rest. My hope is that I just need a day of rest and relaxation and I'll be good to go.

Shout-outs:
*Naser- A few common Kiswahili words Megan and I use frequently in the classroom are: "sikiliza" (listen), "andika" (write), "kaa chini" (sit down), "chora" (draw), and "inzuri sana" (very good). Test those out on your younger siblings the next time you're helping with some homework. PS-- When do you leave for Greece?
*Dad- Thanks for the DMB reference. Did you get the CD's I mailed home? Hopefully you've been listening to your favorites. I miss you.
*Mom- I had bug spray on. The mosquitos are nearly non-existent in this part of Tanzania due to the higher elevation and cooler weather. I was wearing bug spray during our hike (I was even carrying some with me), but a random bug (it felt pretty big) landed on the crack of skin on my back between my jacket and my pants and bit me. Megan's been watching it for me and I've been putting Benadryl cream on it. It itches a bit and is a little tender to touch (you can barely see the bite). I'll keep you updated.

Visit to Moshi

2008-06-22T04:43:00.004-04:00

We're currently sitting in an internet cafe in Moshi with our friends, Jake and Mitch. We met the boys here in Moshi on Friday and have spent the entire weekend here. The bus ride to Moshi began in Arusha on Friday around 2 PM. After being told we would be charged 2,000 shillings (a little less than $2 US), Megan and I were forced to pay 2,500 shillings when we refused to give up our bags (to be placed out of our sight) in order to accommodate another passenger. I'm usually very willing to make space for others on public transportation, but in the case of a mini-bus, making space for others means cramming five people into a bench built to hold three. If our mini-bus had crashed at any point, which is totally possibly, I have no idea how we would've gotten out. Every space of the bus was filled. Kids were sitting on strangers' laps, strangers were sitting shoulder to shoulder with their bags at their feet, there was absolutely no leg room. The other bizarre aspect of riding a mini-bus is that there is no air conditioning and the windows are kept closed the entire time. With nearly 40 people on a bus built to hold at most 25 and absolutely no air flow, the stench and heat produced inside could have killed a puppy. It was the longest bus ride of my life.

Friday evening the boys met us at the bus station and took us to a local bakery. We then headed back to their house to meet their host family. Their family is considerably richer than Pastor Harry's, which was made obvious by the porcelain choo, electricity, and running water. Their family was very sweet and allowed us to watch as they cleaned a freshly killed chicken.

After meeting Jake and Mitch's family, we headed out to dinner with their friends Luke and Jeff. Jeff volunteers with Jake and Mitch at their conservation project and Luke is a Peace Corps volunteer who teaches in Morogorro. We had an enjoyable Western dinner (pizza) with great conversation. It was nice to be surrounded by people with similar interests and a belief in bettering the world around them. When we got to our hotel that night, Megan and I both commented on how much we enjoyed talking to smart, humble, genuine people.

Saturday was our big adventure. We went with all of the boys and their "brother," Oscar, to hike in Kilimanjaro Park. Our destination was the twin waterfalls. Unfortunately it had recently rained and much of the park and surrounding village was completely mud-filled. Our dalla-dalla could only take us halfway up the village before fishtailing, forcing us to hike an additional 1 1/2 miles to the start of our hike. The hike itself was very enjoyable, despite the mud. Actually, the mud might have enhanced the experience. We all fell multiple times, myself a few more times than everyone else, because we hadn't thought to bring our hiking poles. By the end of our trip, we were covered in mud, leaving our shoes and hands unrecognizable. I was bit by a few bugs and caught a few thorns in my hand, but I'm no worse for the wear. I am a bit sore today, though.

After hiking for nearly 5 hours, we made it to the twin waterfalls. My words can't do them justice and I'll attempt to post some pictures when we arrive back in Arusha. The entire hike gave me a greater appreciation for nature and a stronger desire to do my part to help conserve the planet. I never expected Tanzania to be this beautiful. There are probably hundreds of surprisingly beautiful places across the planet that I don't know about. That alone encourages me to remain as eco-conscious as I can. If I can do my part to preserve these majestic corners of the world, I'll have spread their beauty.

The hike ended up taking a total of 7 hours, with no food other than bars and nuts. By the end of the day we were both exhausted and hungry. We ended the day at a local restaurant called, "Golden Showers." Famished, we ate fish, chips, veggies, and chipate (a local bread product similar to a tortilla). All in all it was a wonderful weekend with wonderful people. Megan and I feel really blessed to have met Mitch and Jake and look forward to other excursions with Mitch (Jake heads back to Chicago in a week).

Potty Talk

2008-06-19T07:53:00.005-04:00

Emotionally I'm doing well, but I've come down with my first case of diarrhea. Attempting to relieve myself in the choo [pronounced cho (as in hoe)- o (as in oh my goodness)], which is simply a hole in the ground you squat over, is not the easiest of feats. It's also fairly disgusting. I never realized how wonderful traditional toilets were until today. I visited the choo at school three times and each time it became increasingly difficult. To make matters worse, it rained all morning and all of my clothes were soaked when I arrived in Ngaramtoni. I'm sure my hiking boots will never pass an inspection by the US Health Department. 4 Pepto's later, I'm still feeling slightly rumbly in my tummy, but am hoping for the best. Of course, Megan's stomach is made of steal and she's working on the opposite problem. We've decided that we need to combine forces to create the ultimate stool.

We had another great day at school today. The kids are dedicated learners and are particularly thankful for everything we teach them. After each lesson, they shout in unison, "Thank you, Teacher!"

Today we split into our English groups. Megan's group worked on writing their names and singing the ABC's. Offhand, I heard our teacher correct Megan's version of the ABC song. The Swahili version is fairly similar with Z being pronounced as "zed" and sung to a different tune. Megan reports that her group of students, about 7, have no letter concepts and a very difficult time spelling their names. My students continued working on the short -e and short -u sounds. The students used the flashcards I created and sorted the words according to the vowel sound they produced. I also wrote the words on the board and had the students practice sounding them out. We finished by drawing pictures for each of the short -e words. When I collected their homework from yesterday, those who completed it smiled proudly, while the few who forget looked extremely embarassed. I reassured those students that I wasn't upset, but they still appologized profusely, "Sorry, Teacher. Teacher, I do more."

We finished the day by creating "All About Me" books, my mother in-law's idea. Megan begane the lesson by reading the book, "Whoever You Are," a wonderful story about diversity. We discussed with the kids the things that make us the same and different from one another. Sweet Nuru shared with us what love means, "I would hug someone if they're hurt and tell them they are ok." The kids were enthralled with the book. As I sat back listening to Megan, I looked at all of their faces and their eyes were glued to the book and every now and then they would chuckle as our teacher translated the book into English.

After Megan read the book, we created the kid's personal books. The kids were in awe that we had created books of paper just for them. Our teacher pulled me aside as the kids chattered away in Swahili and said, "They're saying, 'It's like a real book!' They are very happy to have this book." We had the kids write and design their covers (Title: All About Me. Author: Musa, picture of Musa). Each kid numbered their pages and we then had them fill in the first page. I wrote on the chalkboard "My name is Michelle. I have 6 people in my family." The kids copied this onto their first page and wrote their own names and how many people they have in their family. We then had them draw each family member and label them. At the end of the period, each kid came to the front and read their book.

Megan and I are really proud of the kids. Their really working hard and are being challenged more than I think they have ever been. When we've left each day this week, our teacher always says, "The kids, they are so tired." Today we even had a few with tears of exhaustion in their eyes and one who was nearly asleep at his desk. I'm happy their working so hard, but I don't want them to over-exert themselves. We may have to scale back a bit.

Moment of the day:
* Seeing all of the girls' drawings of themselves. In Tanzania, it's required by the government that students wear their hair shaved. Thus, all of our students have short hair. All of the girls in our class drew themselves with long, flowing black hair that flipped at the ends.

Expectations

2008-06-18T08:46:00.003-04:00

I thought I might have a go at this blog since my all of the keys on my keyboard appear to be working and the internet is only 3 times slower than at home. This is Megan, by the way. Things are slowly settling into place. We have a long daily routine that begins with a 1 1/2 hour commute to the Village and usually ends with a visit to the internet cafe before we dala-dala back to our hostel. Wednesday's begin with 2 hours of sports/gym for the kids. In other words, there are 2 soccer balls to share amongst 58 children, lots of hopscotch and Michelle's adapted version of 4 square. I can't forget to mention the young, innocent face of one of the children that found amusement in peeing over the cement wall. Apparently, that's the same anywhere in the world. I am happy to finally be teaching. Michelle continues to be my guide and teaches the first grade class. I either teach with her or teach the small groups that need special attention.

This morning we had a meeting with our volunteer program ground coordinator (VPGC), Pastor, the orphanage director, the orphanage director's husband, Michelle, Lindsey and Morgan regarding our volunteer duties. It sounds like a nice plan, to have everyone sit around and get on the same page, however, there are a lot of unsovled problems and political issues that I do not care to be involved in. I do not know what our VPGC and the orphanage director spoke about prior to the meeting, but the orphanage director set foot on the defensive which did not make for an open conversation. We were basically told that we can not give our donations to whoever we want to and when we give our donations to the kids, we must take pictures and give them to the orphanage director and our volunteer program. What if I just want to give a kid my shirt without any strings attached? All in all, things have gotten better, but the expectations of this trip and reality are very far apart. I have faith that all of these experiences will build character and be beneficial even though I may not feel it at the time.

Positive Points
+ We now know how to spot a dala-dala thief. Do not change places on the dala-dala when they ask, it's just a trick to steal. Or, you could just watch Michelle. If she has her metal water bottle out and ready to hit an attackers hand as it gets too close to anyone's valuables then you should hold on to your money!
+ The kids have been wonderful. The first grade class is so fun to work with. Michelle and I love analyzing the kids and discussing their different personalities. There are some things that can be done regardless of the language barrier. My heart tends to fall for the shy, quiet kids although I would completely miss out if the class clowns and bossy princesses did not exist.
+ Does anyone else find it ironic that our electricity in the hostel goes out every night since we left our mud hut that didn't have any electricity?
+ We are going to Moshi this weekend to visit Mitch, Jake, their brother Ocsar, and some waterfalls in Moshi National Park.
+Michelle's homesickness is weakening:) Maybe it's because she found out it was possible to adopt a child from Tanzania - watch out Evan!! Musa's pretty cute!

Hope

2008-06-18T08:43:00.007-04:00

A quick update. Megan, of course, did a beautiful capturing our day today. Read the post above for her insight into our trip.

I've started linking the blogs of the volunteers we've befriended while here in Tanzania. It might be interesting to read the blogs of our friends to hear their opinions and perspectives on life in Tanzania.

Yes, it's true, I found out today that it's possible for Westerner's to adopt Tanzanian children. The biggest hurdle a Westerner has to overcome is residency. Essentially, a Westerner must live in Tanzania for 6 consecutive months. As soon as I heard this, along with a comment that the Orphanage Director is open to volunteers adopting double orphans from the Village, my wheels began spinning. I immediately e-mailed Evan when I got to the internet today and am hoping to have a good conversation with him about this. There are obvious pros and cons to adopting at 24, but my heart leans towards adoption. I have a feeling, though, that Evan will end up being my source of reason and put the kibosh on this for the time being. There are two kids, Musa and Clinton, however, who've won me over. I'm trying not to get ahead of myself and really waiting until I talk to Evan and the Orphanage Director about the realities of adoption.

Picture Update

2008-06-17T08:53:00.006-04:00

Megan and I at the future site of the Orphanage. This site will hold an actual orphanage (building with bedrooms), cafeteria, and school. Due to financial issues, the building of the orphanage has been put on hold indefinitely. Currently the orphans in the Village live alone at their parent's homes or with other family members (typically older siblings or grandparents). Megan and I's first grade class. There are 17 students in this class. The classroom is shared with three other classes (kindergarten and preschool). The board at the front of the room is painted black and utilized as a chalkboard.
Orphans headed home early from school due to a food shortage. For the past two weeks, the students at the Orphanage have not been fed lunch. This is due to a food shortage that is a result of financial problems. When there is no food, the kids are sent home early and miss half of the school day. All of the kids walk to and from school unescorted. Typically these kids walk between 1-4KM to and from school each day. It's heart breaking watching the little three year olds walk through the village alone. They all appear to have an incredible sense of direction.
Orphans eating porridge. Part of the food the students receive is a small mug of porridge. This is served daily and appears to have no nutritional value.

Sitting with two of the orphans at the Orphanage. Pastor's mud hut. Megan and I lived here for a week before being moved to the volunteer hostel. The cement bricks to the left of the picture are the current portion of Pastor's new house. In Tanzania it is common practice to build what you can and stop when you run out of money. When you obtain more funds, you continue building. We plan on paying for a building the rest of Pastor's new house for him in the next 3 weeks. The mud hut we lived in currently houses Pastor and his wife. Other buildings on his property house his children, neices, mother, cow, goat, chickens, kitchen, and choo.
Megan and I in the City, the city our village is located in. Mount Meru is located behind us. The roads in the City can barely be considered roads and more likely resemble trails. Much of the local business takes place in the general market area of the City, including the selling of produce, timber, and fabric.

Mount Kilimanjaro from our bus ride to Arusha. I'm in shock that this is what I plan on attempting to summit on my first backpacking experience. I really am crazy. Megan and I in Arusha waiting for our fellow volunteer, Moragn, to arrive. Notice the backpacks on the front. This is the standard practice in Arusha if you're Muzungo (white person) and want to protect yourself from having anything stolen. Petty theft is very common in Arusha and obvious tourists, such as Megan and I, are prime targets.
Megan and I in theVillage, with Mount Meru in the background. We were so stressed and overwhelmed the first few days that we didn't realize how close we were to Mt. Meru. Luckily we had a beautiful day and were able to bask in Meru's beauty.

Choo (bathroom) break on our 10 1/2 bus ride from Dar Es Salaam to Arusha on Sunday, June 8. Our bus ended up breaking down in Moshi which caused us to sto every 5 KM or so to fill the radiator with water. The 1 hour trip from Arusha to Moshi ended up lasting 4 hours.

Rollercoaster

2008-06-16T09:48:00.005-04:00

Life in Africa, thus far at least, is completely erratic. One day I'm planning on coming home in the next week, the next day I'm feeling as if I never want to leave. Last week was particularly difficult due to financial, food, and safety issues on both our volunteer program's and the orphanage's part. Watching the trip you planned for 2 years seeminly wash away in front of your face is a difficult reality to bear. It's hard to put into words the amount of frustration and stress I felt last week. Being here in Tanzania, particularly the Village, is very overwhelming due to the incredible amount of need that is coupled with bigger picture issues of corruption, racism, and poverty. It will take time to work through these big picture issues, but I'm constantly journaling and talking to the other volunteers in hopes of having some clarity on the situation.

We're still on for building Pastor's house. We've had to be assertive about our desire to complete this project as our volunteer program would like us to simply focus our attention on the orphanage. We plan on keeping the orphanage as our main priority and spending our alotted 6 hours a day volunteering there. In our free time, however, we plan on using our own money to assist Pastory in completing his home. Getting dirty and doing physical work will be very rewarding and we hope to have the house completed in full before we leave in 6 weeks.

School went well today. We missed the first half of the school day due to a late start to the day (breakfast at our hostel across town wasn't prepared on time). I was able to complete a basic assessment on the first grade class. I graded the first part of the assessment over the weekend and it's evident that some of the students are doing well, while others are struggling. The plan is to divide the students into groups according to their ability and then teach from there. Luckily I have an incredible mother in-law who has been assisting me with coming up with creative lesson plans and ideas to use in a classroom with no resources.

Pastor invited us over for lunch this afternoon to surprise his wife and eldest niece, W. They were both happy to see us and immediately ran to us with huge grins on their faces shouting, "Caribou sane!!!" (You're very welcome!). It was great getting to see Pastor's family once again and to be warmly welcomed into their home. I was told by Mama that H., Pastor's 13 year old niece, wore a purple suit to church on Sunday. Mama told me, "Michelle, H. looked so smart at church. She sang so beautifully with her new suit!" I owe Michelle English a big thank you for the clothes she donated. Everyone in Pastor's family was finally wearing a new outfit today. The pride and joy on their faces was felt by everyone at their home.

Moment of the day:
Having my students color pictures of their names. As each child finished their name, I hung it on the wall in their classroom. Every child beamed with pride and whispered to their friend each name as it was taped up. I've never seen a classroom of children so excited and happy to see their own names taped to the wall.

PS: Still not able to add pictures. More attempts later.

Home and School

2008-06-13T11:12:00.005-04:00

Due to some poor financial situations (which included a lack of funding for Pastor to feed us appropriately), Megan and I have been moved out of Pastor's home and into a hostel in Arusha. We'll be spending the rest of our 6 weeks in this hostel with other volunteers in the area. We owe a HUGE amount of thanks to Megan's dad, Don, and my father in-law, Bob, for making the appropriate calls in the U.S.

Moving out of Pastor's house was difficult because the money situation was not his fault and we didn't want him to think we didn't enjoy living with him and his family. We payed him in Tanzanian shillings for the food he paid out of pocket to feed us (food that should've been paid for by our volunteer company). Everyone in his family cried when we left, including his 13 year old niece (a double orphan), H., and his 6 year old daughter, P. Of course, Megan and I cried as well. It's hard leaving such a warm, loving environment when you know the people who cared most about you weren't being treated fairly. We informed the family that we'd be back to see them on Monday, but we feel like our comment was lost in translation.

Little does Pastor know, however, that we've found our purpose in the Village. Megan and I, as well as the two other volunteers in our village, Magnus and Morgan, have decided that we have the money and man power to finish building Pastor's new house. We'll be surprising Pastor with this news on Monday when we hope to start the project. We're expecting the project to take about 1 month to complete. We plan on using $500 of our donation money to go towards this project. We chose this as our pet project as Pastor has given so much to the community and doesn't have enough to provide appropriately for his own family. He is a modern Masaai man who has an incredible heart and looks out for everyone. This is the best way we can thank him.

Although we're going to be spending a great deal of time working on Pastor's new house, I am still focusing my attention on teaching at the village school. I've been working primarily with the older students, approximately first grade. Another volunteer and I gave them a test today to determine where their abilities lie in English and math. I'll be grading the first half of the test this weekend and finishing the test on Monday. The plan is to then break the class (about 15 students) into two groups according to their abilities and teach them accordingly. I've already created basic consonant-vowel-consonant spelling lists and lesson plans to teach next week. I'm thinking we'll need to go back even further, however, with some students and focus on letter identification.

I'm quickly falling for my students. I now know all of their names and am beginning to distinguish their unique personalities. Musa Luca is shy and reserved, most likely because he's dealing with the stress of watching his father die a slow, painful death of skin cancer and AIDS. Sophia is sassy and bossy. Freddy is very smart and quick to learn. Winniefreida comes from a family of 10, with two mothers and one father (traditional Masaai men have multiple wives), and she always comes to school with a bright smile on her face and incredible spunk. Clinton is constantly covered in dust and dirt, yet smiles shyly when I complement his work with a cheerful "inzuri sane!" (very good!). Jackson always has a huge grin on his face and leaves school by shouting, "I love you Teacher Michelle!" It's only been a week and I'm completely head over heels for this class. I'm positive part of my heart will be placed in the palms of each of these kids when I leave in 6 weeks.

Need requests:
* Any financial donations to assist in building Pastor's house would be appreciated. We have enough for the basics (cement blocks, wood beams for the ceiling, tin for the roof, windows, doors, etc), but do not have enough to purchase enough beds and shelving units for inside the home. Pastor lives with his wife, his 6 year old daughter, his orphaned neices (W.- 19 and H.- 13), and his mother. He also frequently houses volunteers and other people in need of a warm place to stay. Please e-mail or comment if you'd like to donate money to go towards Pastor's home building.
* $500 a year sponsorship for either P. or H. in order to attend a boarding school. Neither girl is receiving a quality education and both are desperate to learn and enjoy school. Please e-mail or comment if you're interested.

PS: Pictures aren't loading at this computer. I'll try a different internet cafe this weekend.

Meeting the Needs of Others

2008-06-12T09:20:00.003-04:00

It's hard to write a post today. Earlier today I received an e-mail from the UVA student I student-taught with in Charlottesville letting me know that one of our students had been shot and killed in a random act of violence. This is one of the moments they don't teach you how to handle in ed. school, especially when you're thousands of miles away in a third world country. I still want to work in a poor, urban school where this is a reality. I just wish I were in a better position now to handle my first loss.

At the moment, the best I can do is fill you in on some needs that need to be met in our village. I'll be attempting to post any needs on the blog that I believe you can assist me with. You can either comment or e-mail me to let me know how you could be of assistance.

Need Request 6/12/08:
1. A Kenyan, Christian missionary is staying at our host family's house. He is in his mid-twenties and speaks basic English and fluent Swahili. We spoke with him for a long time last night and he filled us in on his deep passion to visit the United States, particularly Los Angelos. He would like to come and work with a local church in the states to learn from them and bring his skills back to Kenya. If you have a church in your area or know of anyone in the Los Angelos area that might be able to assist him, please let me know.
2. We are in need of creative ideas to use in the classroom. There are little to no resources available, the classroom is shared with two other classes, and the teachers have no formal training. We are also dealing with a language barrier. We're in particular need of introductory English reading and math lessons.
3. Our host father, Pastor, would like to connect with Americans who can assist him in meeting the needs of his village. Pastor has an incredible heart and has given everything he owns to help his community. He has no money (he can't even finish building his own home), yet he has found ways to pay for street children to attend boarding school, to feed and house orphans, and ways to empower the local widows. If you are connected with any organization or are personally willing to speak with Harry about his visions (IE: HIV/AIDS prevention training in the village, funds to complete the village orphanage, and others), please let me know.

The most important thing I've learned thus far is that you can't rely on a middle-man in Tanzania. This may be a problem in all third-world countries, but it is a particular problem we've noticed in Tanzania. Because of this reason, I am only going to post the needs of people who I trust and feel as if I can truly serve. There are a plethora of needs that need to be met in this area, but all too often corruption is involved and the people who need the most assistance don't receive it. My hope is to directly impact the lives of the people I meet and not allow corruption to seep into my assistance.

Overwhelmed

2008-06-10T08:23:00.003-04:00

I'm feeling completely overwhelmed today. The realitites of serving a poor, primative village are starting to set in. I'm not exactly sure what role I'm supposed to play. There is an incredible amount of need in the Village. I as a simple Mzungo (white person) am seen as a meal ticket, but I'm not sure how I can best meet the needs of this population.

Simply walking through the village and interacting with the children at school, I find I develop a huge pit in my stomach. Many of the villagers live in traditional Massaai mud huts and have no running water or electricity. There is little to no food in the area. Most people (including us), simply eat bananas, ugali (similar to mashed potatoes, but with a thicker consistancy, less taste, and no nutritional value), stew with beef fat, rice, and chipate (similar to crepes). The primary beverage of choice is tea.

Many days the kids go home from school hungry as there wasn't any food available to them for lunch. The children arrive at school whenever they want and typically wearing the same outfit they wore the day before. Their outfits are the countrywide uniform accompanied by heavly used t-shirts, tanktops, and ratty sweatshirts. Some arrive without any shoes on and many simply wear flip-flops.

It's obvious that some are not healthy-- they have constant runny noses, deep chest coughs, and are tired. One child has tested positive for HIV, but with an estimated 50% adult HIV rate in the village, there are bound to be more children who are HIV+. I have spotted a few children running around with mouth sores and lesions on their tounge, both signs of end stage AIDS.

The schooling here is poor. The village teachers come and teach whenever they want. One simply chose not to teach today. There is no formal outline as to what the children are going to be taught and their teachers have no background in education. The teacher today asked me what she should teach her students because she has no idea how to teach. I couldn't tell her what to teach since I have only briefly met the kids, so I offerred to assist her in whatever she thought was best for today. The supplies that are available are extremely primative and of little use. There is a room of donations, but they're not typically used (which I haven't figured out yet).

The biggest issue the Village is facing is HIV/AIDS. In this village, according to the villagers, HIV/AIDS does not exist. People just die. There is no prevention happening here. You simply do not talk about the disease. Adults are ot tested. Men have multiple wives. Men and women cheat on each other. Prostitution is a way of life. If you are found to have HIV/AIDS, you're completely ostracized. Although the children have been tested once, two more rounds of testing are needed. The results, however, are only useful to the volunteers. No child will receive any treatment as this would signify that they are HIV+ and thus kick them out of the community.

What then is my role? How can I appropriately make a difference in this community? It's something I'm going to have to mull over. I have a few ideas... paying for the final HIV tests, assessing all of the kid's English skills and creating developmental lesson plans for the teachers to use, etc. Unfortunately, I'm not 100% positive I can make a difference here. I feel like a small band-aid on a gaping wound. I'm not going to give up, but it's certainly going to be difficult.

Shout outs:
* Jessica--- Keep those kids in line at Poco. You would die if you saw the kids here.
* Bob--- I wish you could mail Megan and I a salad, actually.
* Mitch--- Come save us when Magnus leaves.

Funny moment:
I wasn't sure where I should brush my teeth, so last night I brushed it in the "choo" (bathroom= hole in the ground surrounded by a wooden shack). My Masaai mom said to Megan while I was in there, "Is Michelle brushing the teeth? This not America. She needs to be free and brush the teeth out here."

Arrived in Arusha

2008-06-09T09:26:00.003-04:00

I must begin this post with a few appologies:

*Danny and Stacie Courtney-- My biggest appologies for any and all grammatical and punctuation errors found within this blog. It's amazingly crazy how little 30 minutes feels, especially when the keyboard is horribly sticky.
* Naser-- Sorry for continuing to spell your name in correctly. Luckily the version with two -s is more traditional.
* Megan-- Sorry for misrepresenting you at any point in time. I should clarify that the homesickness experienced was mine and not "ours."
* Jake and Mitch-- Future appologies if any of these blog posts are "i-pod worthy."

Onward to Arusha.....

After an incredibly long (approximately 10 1/2 hours) bus ride, we arrived in Arusha. We anticipated this was going to be a long day, but thought we were out of the woods when our bus ran smoothly for the first 6 hours. Upon arriving to Moshi and the base of Kilimanjaro, our bus broke down and we could only drive about 10 minutes before we needed to stop and refill the radiator with water. At about 9:30 PM we arrived in Arusha and were met by the assitant director of Village Orphanage. We gathered our bags and headed to the village.

I haven't had much time to really reflect on the life we're leading, thus a brief synopsis. Megan and I are staying in a traditional Masaai village with the assistant director's family. This man, Pastor, has three children and one wife. The one wife is a critical detail as Masaai men traditionally have multiple wives. Pastor refers to himself as "a modern Masaai man." We are living in the mud hut (corrugated steel roof) of Pastor and his wife. Our room is the extra bedroom they keep for volunteers and is approximately 10 ft by 7 ft and contains one shelf and a bed that's just over twin size. Luckily Megan and I are skinny, so we both slept comfortably last night, head to foot. There is no electricity or running water. We use our head lamps at night and use the village toilet (literally a hole in the ground that is encased with wood for privacy.... we've yet to attempt #2). We haven't bathed yet, but will be using boiling water poured in a bucket to sponge bathe ourselves.

Two of Pastor's kids are attending school at a boarding school 200 KM away. Pastor had to discontinue building his modern, brick home because he used his money to send his kids to a better school. His youngest daughter, P., lives with us. She, along with her two cousins (their father and mother died) live in a different mud hut in our village. Pastor's mother also lives in a mud hut in our village. There is also a mud hut for cooking (about 4 ft by 4 ft), a mud hut for the family's cow, and a fenced in pen for the family's goat. There are also chickens wandering around the village.

The orphange we're volunteering at, is actually not an orphanage. We are simply working at the village pre-primary school (2-7 year olds). All of the local kids (many who are orphans) come to school when they choose to and when we're there to teach them. There are two local teachers, but supposedly they're not very reliable. Essentially we'll be making lesson plans on our own and attempting to teach these children the skills we believe they need. Their primary language is Swahili, but they all appear to know basic English. The school is very primative, with wooden benches and wooden tables for the kids to work on. They're provided a pencil and an old notebook to complete their work in. The chalkboard is an old piece of wood that was painted black.

According to the other volunteer we met, HIV/AIDS is extremely stigmatizing in our village. Approximately 50% or more of the village adults are believed to be HIV+, but many do not know or unwilling to find out. Many find out they have AIDS when they are near death. HIV/AIDS testing is not done in this area and there is no HIV/AIDS prevention work going on in our village as the Masaai people do not want anything to do with the disease. The mantra of our village, in regards to HIV/AIDS, is "don't ask, don't tell." The volunteer we met today used her own money to have all of the village's kids tested a month ago. Only one child's test came back as positive. In order to fully test, however, three tests have to be completed. I'm most likely going to use the financial donations to pay for the final two tests to be completed by the American doctor in Arusha.

Pictures to come in the following days. Keep the comments coming!

Shout outs:
* Melissa-- Thanks for all of your wonderful encouragement. I totally felt the hug and have used your words to help me out when I was really feeling homesick.
*Naser-- Always good to hear from you. Swahili is a pretty fun language. It's very phonetic. You might try picking it up, especially with your Arabic skills.

Reflections on DES

2008-06-07T07:52:00.005-04:00

It's been an interesting first week here in Tanzania. As you know, we spent this first week here in Dar Es Salaam, the largest city in the country. Through our Swahili courses (Mambo!--- Hey!) and our tours of the surrounding area, we've begun to better understand this new world around us. We were warned of culture shock, but neither Megan nor I really expected to start learning so much so quickly. By simply immersing ourselves in the Tanzanian culture and community, our eyes have been opened to a world that we never knew existed.

I have found that the Tanzanian people are very friendly. Surprisingly, the entire time we've been here, I've yet to feel scared. There have been moments when I felt I should be more conscious of those around me and the choices I was making, but I've never felt as if I were in a dangerous area or situation. In general, the Tanzanian people (at least those in DES) appear to be equally interested in us as we are in then. We are some of the few white people in most the areas we've traveled too. Just as many of us have never seen so many Africans, I'm assuming many of the Tanzanians have never seen so many white Westerners.

I've been struck by the utter poverty in DES. Many of the roads are unpaved and have huge potholes. There is a dirty film of grime and filth that covers the entire city. Chickens and goats roam the streets freely. Many of the people work in markets or along the streets selling the same goods (videos, t-shirts, sunglasses, etc). Young kids roam the streets at all hours looking for entertainment. Despite all of this, it feels like the Tanzanian people are very happy. This may be a result of not knowing what their missing out, but I'd like to believe they are genuinely happy with the lives they lead. I'm looking forward to better understanding this issue and the role Western assistance plays in providing the Tanzanian people with more opportunities.

Overall, we had a wonderful week. We've made some incredible friends from all walks of life. We've enjoyed delicious meals cooked for us by a local Tanzania. We've spent time connecting with our new friends and the locals at a neighborhood bar. We've swam in the Indian Ocean and walked the streets of DES. No trip is without it's difficulties, though. We've been taken advantage of as Western women and been charged more money by the local GC (our volunteer group) representative. We've lost our box of donations that contained all of the books, toys, and children's clothes. We've also yet to receive the financial donations you all willingly gave. We've been homesick for our families in the States.

With both the up and downs, we're taking this trip in stride. Traveling to a third world country entails hardships, but is also coupled with the opportunity to learn and grow. As we head out to Arusha tomorrow (10 1/2 hour drive), we look forward to connecting with some amazing children and women. Oh, and the plethora of Western restaurants... mmmm pizza!

Shout outs

2008-06-05T09:28:00.003-04:00

Jenna- Good to hear from you!! I need you to update me on my salacious celebrity gossip. Did Brangelina have their twins yet??
Mom- Yes, corn sounds good right about now. I'll give you a call later. Love you!
Kate- Good to hear from you. We're excited to get to the orphanage on Sunday. :)
Nasser- Every morning we're woken up by the Call to Prayer and we think about you. Good luck on your test!

Pictures from DES

2008-06-05T09:08:00.006-04:00

Megan and I after a long day of sight-seeing in DES.

Local fishermen in DES bringing in their catch off the Indian Ocean. The ocean produce (anything from shrimp, to fish, to starfish) is brought in by the men and then auctioned off to the women. The women then place the produce into buckets (commonly carried on their heads) and then take it to the fish market to cook and resell.

Megan and I with the other volunteers at the local fish market.

Megan and I eating lunch at a local restaurant. In order to avoid upset stomachs, we ordered the plain chips (fries) and plain rice. We weren't as daring as our friends who ordered ugali, the local food staple (very similar to bland cream of wheat).

Megan and I at the "agricultural market." This market had formally been the largest market in all of East Africa. It is currently used as a central location for the selling and trading of agricultural products in DES.

Dar Es Salaam

2008-06-04T11:00:00.002-04:00

We're now into our third day here in DES. We attempted to use the internet yesterday, but it was down at the local cafe. We tried a different one today and luckily it was up and running. Our hostel has had the power and water shut off because the owners couldn't pay the bill. It's going to get stinky very fast.

yesterday (sorry for the poor punctuation and grammar, this keyboard is not so great) we had Swahili class in the morning and then headed over to the local village museum. the museum reminded me of colonial williamsburg in that it held replicas of the various tribal homes across tanzania. most tanzanians live in modern homes, although those who live in the very rural areas live in the traditional tribal homes. We learned a neat fact, most tribal homes had two separate home for the kids and the parents so that the parents had a place to "make babies." At the end of our tour, we watched some tribal dancing and were then brought out into the yard to dance with the tribal dancers. It was really fun.

today we walked the city of DES for 8 hours with our local guide. We visited the national museum, the fish market, an agriucultural market, and the carver's market. the best way I can describe DES is for you to think of being at your state fair. the city is covered in a permenant layer of filth and grime which is punctured in areas with the vibrant hues of the fresh produce and silks. there is a ever-present smell of BO in DES. Despite all of it's third world conditions, I've found it to be a very vibrant and friendly city. there are obviously people trying to haggle us to buy their products, but with a simple, "hapana asante" (no thank you) they tend to walk off.

the food hasn't been great. we're served mostly eggs, rice, and a local stew. megan and I plan on eating at the recommended "western restaurants" in Arusha on the weekends in order to keep our weight up. We've made a vow to each other that if it appears as if either of us has lost 10 pounds, then we're both coming home.

We have a weekend of open ended activities. A group of people are going to zanzibar, but we're not going because we're going with megan's parents in August. We're most likely going to hang out at the hostel and in DES with our local guide and the other 5 people who are not going to DES. We'll be taking a 10 1/2 hour bus ride to arusha on sunday to get to the orphanage. we'll be riding with two other volunteers, a girl from S.F. and a guy from Denmark.

Shout outs--
*Evan- I miss you terribly. Have a wonderful anniversary! It's been a great 3 years. Here's to many more.

Neat sighting--
* a young boy in town wearing a columbus dispatch t-shirt.

PS- We're having trouble finding an internet cafe that allows us to add pictures. we'll update when we find one.

In Dar Es Salaam

2008-06-02T09:34:00.006-04:00

It's Monday, June 2nd, at 4:34 PM and we're hitting up our first African internet cafe. It's costing us 7 cents for thirty minutes of internet use. Although it's cheap, we'll probably only be accessing the internet once a day because we can't travel around the city without our local guide.

We've been here since yesterday evening and are just barely starting to settle in. The homesickness and culture shock tore over Megan and I like a wave yesterday when we walked out of the DES airport. We both miss home, but our nerves were calmed when we called home last night. We're planning on purchasing more air time for our cell phones this evening, as we only bought 1 hour originally.

We've started learning Swahili and have been taken on a tour of DES. The city reminds me of Belize City, Belize. It's not horribly rural or "destitute," but definitely not like anywhere I've ever lived. It reminds me of a poor city in the US during the 70's or 80's, but with little paved roads. Many Tanzanians walk the streets frequently. The people we've encountered have all been friendly and kind. We're being very safe with our personal items and aren't traveling anywhere alone.

Tomorrow we're having more Swahili classes and then visiting a local museum where we'll learn about the more than 150 tribes in Tanzania.

Shout outs:
* Moore Family-- Good to hear from you guys! I'm learning a lot about third world travel that I'm sure you might have experienced in Guatemala.

PS: Keep the comments coming. They're very helpful in dealing with the homesickness!

Final Day in Dubai

2008-05-31T13:04:00.002-04:00

Only a few minutes left on the internet. We had a wonderful last day in Dubai today. We visited the largest mosque in Dubai (check out our pictures), visited a local book store (I picked up three traditional Arabic children's books that are written in English), visited a local mall, and then headed over to the Madinat Jumeriah. The Madinat Jumeriah is a hotel resort that is full of airconditioned souqs. We primarily wandered around, but we didn't buy anything because everything was over-priced and unrelated to Arabic culture. We ended the day with an incredible Lebanese meal--- a special treat from Nasser.

We're off to Dar Es Salaam tomorrow morning at 10:50 Dubai time. It might be a few days before we have internet access. We might, however, have cell phones by tomorrow evening (tomorrow morning for you), so answer all strange phone calls.

Shout outs:
Dad- I love that you're my "blog buddy." I was tempted to by you a traditional Arabic outfit today, but realized how expensive it was and passed. Sorry!
Melissa- Share the pictures with the boys! It can be a neat little virtual field trip. Give them BIG hugs from me.

Call to Prayer

2008-05-31T12:54:00.004-04:00

The following is the final call to prayer for the day at the Gold Souq on Friday, May 30, 2008.

Unique to the Middle East

2008-05-31T12:39:00.007-04:00

The sign above Megan reads, "Prayer Room." This was in the local mall. Muslims are encouraged to pray 5 times a day. Thus, the call to prayer. Depending on the devotion of the particular Muslim, they will or will not pray in public places, such as the local shopping mall.

Muslim men traditionally wear a light covered robe-like clothing called dishdasha. On their heads, the men wear a hijab. The color of the hijab is typically a fashion/cultural preference, with many Saudi Arabian men preferring to wear a red and white checkered hijab.

Muslim women traditionally cover their entire bodies in a dark robe-like clothing called an abaat. This is done to symbolize modesty. Many Muslims choose for themselves how covered they wish to be, with some preferring to even cover their faces, leaving only slits for their eyes to show or wearing a light veil over their entire face. The facial covering, however, is not related to religious beliefs and is more of a cultural preference.

Per religious custom, Muslims do not eat pork. Thus, the local grocery store has a pork shop specifically for non-Muslims.

Pictures from Dubai

2008-05-31T12:24:00.006-04:00

Megan and I at the Burj al Arab, on Saturday, May 31, 2008. The Burj al Arab is the building in Dubai. Much of Dubai consists of excessively large and creative skyscrapers, but the Burj al Arab is primary sight to see in Dubai, such as the Eiffle Tower is in Paris. Burj al Arab translates into "tower of the Arabs" and is currently used as 7 star hotel.

Megan and I at the Jumeriah Mosque, the largest mosque in Dubai, on Saturday, May 31, 2008. The mosque was not open today. When open, however, Muslim men and women must enter in separate enterances and proceed to pray in different areas of the church. At the top of each tower is a speaker that is used to broadcast the call to prayer 5 times a day.

Megan and I at the Gold Souq on Friday, May 30, 2008. A souq is a traditional market-place where various goods are sold. Haggling is mandatory.

Megan and I in the Arabian Gulf on Friday, May 29, 2008. Behind us is the outer ring of The Palms--- a series of man-made islands created to look like a palm tree.

Day in Dubai

2008-05-30T13:48:00.002-04:00

I can't decide if the Middle Eastern men find Megan and I attractive or if we're simply easy eye candy. We're definitely exotic looking and we were shocked by the amount of men staring at us, particularly our calves! Either way, we spent the evening wandering the local souqs (open air market). This was a recommended activity in our Lonely Planet travel guide and it was truly amazing. Essentially you wander around the shops as the shop owners attempt to haggle you into buying their various products. Having Nasser with us was incredibly helpful as he speaks fluent Arabic. Our craziest adventure was being taken up a private elevator to an Indian man's shop to use his restroom. My mother would die if she saw us. In an attempt to thank him for allowing us to use his bathroom, Nasser asked to see his watches. We were then taken into a locked room where they held all of their knock-off designer handbags, sun glasses, and watches. Unfortunately, Nasser couldn't haggle the price of a watch down enough so we left empty handed. It was an expereince Megan and I never would have had if Nasser hadn't have been with us. He's definitely our life savior.

On our way to grab a cab, we heard the final call to prayer for the day. I was able to get it on video as Nasser explained the different aspects of the call. Hopefully I'll be able to upload that video before we leave Dubai.

Other interesting tidbits:
* Swam in the Arabian Gulf today.
* Drank camel's milk.
* Tasted fresh spices in the spice souq.

Shout outs:
Mom--- I miss you terribly. I've already filled one memory card with pictures and videos!
Allison--- Andrew needs to visit Dubai STAT! There is construction literally all over the entire city.
Melissa--- Thanks for checking in on Evan. Hopefully he wasn't too bothered. You rock!

Love and hugs!

More tomorrow from Dubai. :)

Dubai- Day 2

2008-05-30T03:52:00.002-04:00

We visited the Emirates mall yesterday. It was HUGE! Big enough to hold the world's first indoor ski slope!Crazy. There is a ton of construction going on here and it's super hot. We're sepending today indoors and then visiting a local neighborhood tonight when things cool off. More tomorrow.

In Dubai

2008-05-29T07:58:00.001-04:00

We're here in Dubai. We're staying in the Harbour Hotel and have a room with a view of the Arabian Gulf. Only 5 minutes of internet access. Will update more tomorrow. HUGS!

Leaving

2008-05-28T10:25:00.000-04:00

We're eating lunch and waiting to board. People watching in the international terminal is the best. See ya in dubai.

In nyc

2008-05-28T07:25:00.001-04:00

I'm in nyc waiting for my bags and megan. We'll be reunited after being apart for two years. Challenge #1: all of my bags arriving in nyc. Challenge #2: getting my bags to the international terminal.

Approximate Timeline

2008-05-26T18:42:00.004-04:00

Wednesday, May 28, 2008:
VA-NYC @ 7AM EST
NYC-Dubai @ 11:20 AM EST

Thursday, May 29, 2008:
Arrive in Dubai @ 8:05 AM (Dubai time)

Thursday-Suday:
Tour Dubai with our friend Naser.
Staying @ Harbour Hotel and Residence

Sunday, June 1, 2008:
Dubai-Dar Es Salaam @ 10:50 AM (Dubai time)
Arrive in Dar Es Slaam @ 3:50 PM (DES time)

Sunday-Saturday:
Language and culture training in DES.

Saturday, June 7-July 31, 2008:
Volunteer @ Jane's Orphanage in Arusha.

July 31-Aug. 8, 2008:
Trek Mt. Kilimanjaro, Serengeti safari, and visit Zanzibar Island with Megan's family.

Friday, Aug. 8, 2008:
DES-Dubai @ 5:20 PM (DES time)
Arrive in Dubai @ 11:50 PM (Dubai time)

Sat., Aug. 9, 2008:
Dubai-NYC @ 2:00 AM (Dubai time)
Arrive in NYC @ 7:45 AM (EST)

All Packed Up

2008-05-25T22:58:00.001-04:00

All Packed Up, originally uploaded by michelletschannen.

My life i 3 bags. The boxes include all physical donations I've received. This does not include the monetary donations I received. That money will be given to me upon arrival in Dar Es Salaam, where Megan and I will be able to buy specific items the orphanage is in need of.

Packing List

2008-05-25T22:24:00.003-04:00

The trekking and hiking rainbow burst in my living room and for the past 2 hours I've been sitting amidst the lucky charms. Unfortunately, packing isn't an easy task and all of those lucky charms became more of an annoyance. I had no idea how I was going to fit everything into the three bags I had available to me. Weeding through everything was the most difficult part. I'd begin filling one bag, get nearly finished, and then decide that I wanted the mosquito net at the bottom of the bag to be placed in a different bag. I then had to empty out that bag, move the mosquito net, and begin repacking the bag. You can see where this is going. It was a horrible, vicious cycle. At one point, nearly in tears, I called Megan and left her a voice mail begging for packing instructions.

I am finally finished packing. Praise God, Allah, Buddha, Mother Earth, whomever... at least it's finished and with very few tears. I'm actually pretty amazed at how much crap I was able to cram into these two bags. It felt as if my entire living room had been filled with Tanzania gear, yet here I am sitting on the floor leaning against my three stuffed bags. The next big step is to get everything onto the airplanes (yes, I said airplanes). How I'm going to get two backpacks, a duffle bag, and three 30 gallon rubber maid totes onto a JetBlue flight to NYC, onto an Air Emirates flight to Dubai, and then onto a second Air Emirates flight to Dar Es Salaam is beyond me. I may be pretty buff, yeah right, but I'm totally going to need to rent a big wheelie cart. I'm apologizing now for the harm I'll be doing to the environment for all the extra weight I'm adding to the airplanes I'll be flying on. How about sending me carbon offsets for Christmas??

Packing List-

Backpack:
Sleeping bag
Camelback bladder
First aid kit
Trekking poles
1 mosquito net
Green dry sack
Hiking boots
Blue L.L. Bean jacket
North Face fanny pack
Keen sandals
Winter hat
Gloves
Purple ball cap
6 bags of bars
1 SIGG water bottle
3 bathing suits
3 pairs of hiking socks
Bandanna
3 bottles of vitamins
Batteries
2 Tanzania guides
1 journal
Electrical adaptor
Powdered Propel
Flashlight
1 can of permethrin spray

Daypack:
Rain pants
Black hiking pants
Black skirt
Base layer pants
Base layer shirt
Olive green hiking pants
2 shorts (black, khaki)
2 long sleeve tees (white & gold)
3 tank tops (blue, white, gold)
4 t-shirts (red, purple, blue, black)
bra
3 pairs of underwear
2 pairs of socks
3 toiletry bags
5 bottles of sun screen
1 can of bug spray
Feminine products
1 mosquito net

Duffle:
Blue t-shirt
Olive green hiking pants
Sleeping pants
Black dress
Bra
1 pair of underwear
1 pair of socks
Water purification kit
Camping towels
Prescriptions
Bag of toiletries
Tooth brush
Tissues
Eye mask and ear plugs
Hoodie
1 SIGG bottle
Camera
Camera accessories
Dubai guide
Journal
Family gifts
Sunglasses
Blanket
Pillow
Flip flops

Fully Alive

2008-05-25T18:00:00.003-04:00

My father in-law, Bob, passed along this poem in his weekly LifeTrek coaching newsletter. The words of this poet, Dawna Markova, eloquently express how I feel about this trip.

Fully Alive
I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible,
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance;
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom
and that which came to me as blossom,
goes on as fruit.

Tanzanian gear

2008-05-22T20:06:00.001-04:00

Tanzanian gear, originally uploaded by michelletschannen.

Will the people of Tanzania shame me for my "grandma-safari" hat?? Better yet, will Megan?

Test

2008-05-22T18:29:00.000-04:00

Testing mobile blogging.

In the Name of Love: Africa Celebrates U2

2008-05-22T17:50:00.002-04:00

Just downloaded a wonderful CD-- In the Name of Love: Africa Celebrates U2. I have major respect and love for Bono for the voice he's given to the plight's of Africa. What a great way for African musicians to thank Bono for his work?

Worthy track: In the Name of Love .... Lovely, Soweto Gospel choir rendition. BEAUTIFUL

The Packing Begins

2008-05-20T21:44:00.001-04:00

The Packing Begins, originally uploaded by michelletschannen.

A second look at everything I'm attempting to take with me to Tanzania.

The Packing Begins

2008-05-20T21:43:00.001-04:00

The Packing Begins, originally uploaded by michelletschannen.

After weeding through my pile of Tanzania stuff, I've finally created what I hope is the last pile. Thus, I'll be attempting to cram all of this stuff into two backpacks. We'll see how it all ends up.

Crazy Me

2008-05-16T23:27:00.004-04:00

It's only 12 days until I leave for Dubai. I've been waiting 2+ years for this trip, so you'd think I'd be ecstatic. Alas, I'm not. I know, weird right? I've been planning for and dreaming about this trip for so many days and hours. Now that it's nearly here, I'm getting anxious.

For the past few years, I've been trying to better understand the person I am. Of course, a little therapy or work with a life coach would probably assist the situation, but being a poor college student doesn't allot for much spare change. Deep introspection has brought to me the realization that I live a lot of my life in the future. I'm constantly working through my life thinking about the next great adventure. A constant mantra running through my head is, "When X happens, I'll feel Y."

It's all too easy for me to fall into the trap of missing out on the here and now while I anticipate the future. I truly believe in chasing ones dreams, it's what's brought me most of the amazing experiences I've had. I'm afraid, however, that too much dream-chasing has caused me to miss out on many of the little things. Sometimes I catch myself in the act of thinking about tomorrow when I'm living out the moment I stayed up thinking about the night before. For whatever reason, I'm still working that part out, it's really hard for me to stay present. I try and work on it day after day, but I still struggle.

This is the great paradox of my life at the moment. I'm fairly content with the life I'm leading, yet I can't seem to shake the thought that tomorrow will be better than today. I want so desperately to appreciate each second of my life. But is that even possible? I'm afraid it would be mentally and emotionally draining trying to be 100% present at all times. At this point, however, I'd love to live at least 50% of my day in the present. There is a big part of me that believes the world would look differently if I were living fully in the present. The moments when I do live in the moment-- those when I'm with kids-- really are incredible. My senses feel heightened, along with my ability to empathize and my patience. I want that feeling more often.

Spending my life in the future is especially stressful during transitional times, like now. When a big change in my life happens, I worry about how different things will be. I may not have appreciated each moment, but I hang tight to them when they're about to be taken away from me. It seems so contradictory to me, which is where I become confused and my soul searching focuses. This inability to appreciate the now, yet unwillingness to let it go when the then is approaching makes little sense to me.

Here's how it's playing out now:

Wake up in the morning to the clock radio tuned to NPR's Morning Edition. Quickly turn the alarm off before Evan rolls over. Take a bleary-eyed shower, blow-dry my hair, and dress. Eat breakfast while watching the Today Show. Stand in the doorway of the bedroom and whisper goodbye to Evan as I rush off to babysit/tutor. Spend the day babysitting/tutoring and running around completing various last-minute errands. Run/hike. Cook and eat dinner with Evan. Argue with Evan about not having enough quality time and the layer of filth around our apartment. Check e-mails and browse endless blogs/websites while listening to Evan play WoW with his gamer friends. Watch the Daily Show with Evan and pester him about holding the remote. Bed-time routine, read. Rinse. Wash. Repeat.

Throughout much of the day I'm anticipating the trip. When I'm at the bank picking up quarters to pay for my laundry, I'm thinking about what it'll be like washing my clothes in Africa. When I'm dropping off donations at the SPCA, I'm thinking about the women and children I'll meet. When I'm cooking dinner, I'm thinking about African food. Thoughts and excitement about this trip are a constant white noise in my mind.

Now that I'm only 12 days out, however, the anxiety has set in. Since about Monday, I've had a constant pit in my stomach. The white noise is still there, but now it's twinged with more fear than happiness. I'm starting to worry about leaving. Who's going to help Evan move all of the boxes out of the apartment? What will I do if I get sick? How will I get in touch with Evan if he doesn't answer his phone or e-mail? What if I don't like the food. Will my turtles die? It seems so stupid to worry and stress about such things when a life-time dream is about to come true. At times I feel outright embarrassed that I'm becoming so anxious. I have the opportunity of a lifetime approaching me and I'm worried about my turtles?

This is where the learning takes place, right? I have to have the courage to push through the anxiety and fear in order to appreciate this great gift I've been given. I'm trying to keep those butterflies in check and to remember why this trip is so important to me. Listening to Evan talking to his gamer friends as I type this makes it hard to see the sun shine through the clouds. That voice chanting "DPS. I need you to DPS in here," that voice that drives me crazy most nights, I'm going to miss that voice. I'm going to carry that voice in my heart for 2 1/2 months, to remind me to appreciate the here and now, no matter how crazy it makes me feel at the moment. 'Cause when those crazy moments are taken from me, I'll miss them the most.

You're kidding me...

2008-05-14T22:31:00.001-04:00

I'm officially hanging my laundry out to dry for 3 days: http://www.merckvetmanual.org/mvm/index.jsp?cfile=htm/bc/71725.htm

Breakdown of a Bureaucratic System

2008-05-10T11:36:00.003-04:00

April 15, 2008:
* Complete Tanzanian visa paperwork and purchase a $120 money order from Western Union.
* Refuse an offer from various Frat boys at HT to attend their booze fests if I pay for their kegs.
* Lovingly mail off my passport, visa paperwork, and money order. Believe I will have my passport and a fresh-off-the-presses visa in my hands in a few days.

April 16-29, 2008:
* Endlessly check the mailbox in search of my passport and visa.
* Receive packages from Aveda, Moosejaw, Mom, and Amazon.
* Curse the mail woman (we're not on the best of terms).

April 30, 2008:
* Call the Tanzanian Embassy in D.C.
* Attempt to leave a message but the only mailbox available is full.
* Call back multiple times and continue to run into the full-mailbox wall.

May 1, 2008:
* Call the Tananian Embassy in D.C.
* Speak with a male representative who speaks English with a heavy accent.
* Run into my first language barrier, which ran both ways.
* Am told my visa paperwork has not been processed yet and that I should wait a few more days for information.
* Grumble.

May 2, 2008:
* Receive voicemail from Rachel* mentioning casually that the Tanzanian Embassy doesn't accept money orders from Western Union.
* Am informed that I must obtain a new money order and send it immediately to the Embassy, attn: Rachel.
* Visit the post office and begrudgingly purchase another $120 money order.
* Mail off the money order, sprinkle it with good vibes.

May 3-5, 2008:
* Wait patiently for my visa and passport to arrive.
* Begin blaming the Embassy and not the mail woman for the lack of passport/visa in my mailbox.
* Tension headache sets in.

May 6, 2008:
* Call Tanzanian Embassy incessantly until I speak with a live representative.
* Inquire about my visa status. Spell Tschannen 5 times. T-S-C-H-A-N-N-E-N. Yes, 2 N's.
* Am told by Rachel that she cannot locate my passport and visa and that I should call back later.
* Panic sets in.

May 7, 2008:
* Call Tanzanian Embassy and immediately press 0... OPERATOR!
* Rachel picks up the phone.
* Give Rachel my name, spell Tschannen twice, and inform Rachel that we spoke yesterday.
* Am told, "I do not know you. Who is this?"
* Politely remind Rachel of our conversation about my missing passport and visa. Ask her if she found them.
* Am told she has not found them, but that she will look again and call me back later.
* Hang up and proceed to freak out.

May 8-9, 2008:
* Pray to the universe that Rachel calls me with good news.
* Hear nothing from Rachel.
* Pickup junk mail and bills out of the mailbox.

May 10, 2008:
* Call Tanzanian Embassy.
* Immediately press 0, the line to my dear friend Rachel.
* Spell Tschannen 4 times. Become less patient with each spelling.
* Am informed that my passport and visa have been located, but they haven't been processed. Am told Rachel will call me back soon.
* On the verge of tears, I tell Rachel that "I'm leaving in less than 3 weeks! I need this to be expedited!!"
* 4 hours later, receive a voicemail from Rachel stating that: "We have processed your passport and visa, Ms. T-s-ch-nana (rhymes with banana.... not at all how you say TSCHANNEN). We have not mailed your passport back to you yet as you have not informed us when you will be leaving on your trip. Please call us back and let us know when you will be leaving so we can send you your passport and visa in a timely manner. Thank you!"
* Loose my calm. Attempt to call the Embassy, but realize it's now closed.
* Call Megan to vent. "How come you got your passport and visa within a week and I didn't? We have the exact same information on our paperwork?"

May 11, 2008:
* Attempt to call the Embassy to inform them when I will be leaving (information found directly on the visa paperwork I completed), but hit the full voicemail box wall.
* Cry.

------------
I'm not sure where everything went wrong, but I'm now waiting in anxiety to call the Embassy on Monday morning to inform them when I'll be leaving for Tanzania. I'm frustrated for multiple reasons.
1. I lost my original $120 money order as it was NOT posted anywhere on the Tazanian Embassy's website that they didn't accept Western Union money orders.
2. Customer service wasn't all the impressive.
3. Why should I have to inform you when I am leaving for my trip in order for you to send me back my passport and visa? I gave you a self-addressed, stamped envelope as well as paying you the extra $20 so you could expedite the process.

Sigh, I might be making a trip to D.C. next week. Anyone want to meet for a meal?

*Name changed.

UPDATE: After speaking with Rachel twice this week, she's confirmed that passport and visa were sent out yesterday. Time will tell...

Dreaming

2008-05-03T21:58:00.002-04:00

Just finished watching a great video about Tanzania: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lg8fuc1_-d8 I'm now dreaming of all the things I want to do while I'm there. At the moment, 2 1/2 months seems like such a long time, but I'm sure it'll end up flying by.

What's on the IPod?

2008-04-29T20:45:00.002-04:00

School's officially over. Well, I guess not officially, seeing as I haven't walked The Lawn yet. All of my finals are over, so I'd call this whole Master's thing done. I'm now moving on to all of the fun pre-Africa, pre-graduation, pre-moving stuff I've put off all semester. This'll finally be a fun To Do list to wade through.

First on the list? Fill my IPod. With an approximately 8+ hour flight from JFK-Dubai, I'm going to be in some serious need of auditory input. I could totally count Megan as auditory input, but her seat's infront of mine, so we'll probably have to keep the chit-chat to a minimum. There's always the movie option, but that can be hit or miss. Either way, I want to have some music to listen to while I'm in Tanzania, maybe even to share some with the kiddos.

Without further ado, here's what I've uploaded (in no particular order):

Into the Wild audio book, John Krakauer
Into the Wild movie soundtrack, Eddie Vedder
Gnarls Barkley, The Odd Couple
The Avett Brothers, Emotionalism & Four Thieves Gone
Duffy, Mercy
Juno movie soundtrack

I was totally thinking I had uploaded more than just those in the past few days, but alas, I haven't. I already have my standbys, though:

Regina Spektor, Begin to Hope, Soviet Kitsch
Carbon Leaf, Echo, Echo & Indian Summer
John Butler Trio, Sunrise Over Sea
Jack Johnson, Brushfire Fairytales & In Between Dreams
Coldplay, X&Y, A Rush of Blood to the Head, & Parachutes
This American Life podcasts
Bryant Park Project podcasts

I'm definitely looking for some recommendations. Read any good books lately? Any good indie bands? What about a good podcast series? Help me out!

How to stay in contact

2008-04-17T18:46:00.003-04:00

Megan and I are hoping to get cell-phones when we arrive in Dar Es Salaam, Tanzania. We're also hoping to find a local Internet cafe to update the blog with on a weekly basis. If we're able to do so, the best way to keep in contact with us will be through this blog. You can even begin practicing now! Here are the explicit instructions (need mostly for my computer illiterate mom):

Click on this link and read the Blogger directions-- http://help.blogger.com/bin/answer.py?answer=42399&query=commenting&topic=&type=f

It doesn't get any easier than that!

Feel free to ask us any questions in the comments section. We're excited to create an open dialogue space here for the next 4 months or so.

Wherein I admit my status in the "Wimp Club"

2008-04-17T17:50:00.005-04:00

Let it be known that I don't tolerate pain well. I probably shouldn't just say pain. I don't do well with discomfort or anything really that's too outside of my box. Basically, I'm a creature of habit and deviating from that habit is typically met with a great deal of stress and tears. Why then am I spending 2 1/2 months abroad? The logic there fails me as well. Here's to pushing my boundaries!

But back to the low pain tolerance. When I was 5, correct if I'm wrong Mom, I allegedly fell off of my grandpa's bed and cut my forehead after being told multiple times the famous child-hood words, "stop jumping on the bed or you'll get hurt!" I say allegedly because the way I remember things happening is that I was innocently swinging the chord to the window blind and bumped a lamp off a high dresser with the chord, causing the lamp to come crashing down on my face. Oh the travesty! Whichever story is true-- and I'm totally sticking to mine, 19 years later-- I had a huge gash on my forehead that required 2 stitches. Of course, this would be my first trip to the hospital as a patient-- I'd already visited my parents' offices enough times to now refer to the blue H on the hospital building as the "Hennick Hospital." Two stitches on the forehead doesn't seem like much, but to 5-year old me, it was pure torture. I honestly don't remember it, most likely because I literally went into shock. My parents claim the nurses had to strap my hands and feet to the bed a la Frankenstein in order to keep me from squirming away. My mother, a registered nurse, wasn't allowed to stay in the room during the procedure due to my crazy antics and claims she could hear me screaming down the hall. Yeah, it was bad.

When I was 6, I was finally allowed to get my ears pierced. I had been literally waiting YEARS for this glorious day to occur. I think I came out of the womb wanting to sport twinkling gemstones in my ears. Six-year old me believed that every cool girl had her ears pierced and of course my parents wanted me to be uncool. Who in their right mind would make their daughter wait until she was 6 to have her ears pierced?! Oh the humanity! I remember my dad of all people taking me to the local Claire's shop at the mall. I was giddy the entire ride over and through the mall, right until the moment when I walked over to the ear piercing chair of doom. The gun! Yes, they were going to pierce my ears with a GUN! I could fear my stomach knotting up and my eyes beginning to well with tears. I began to backtrack on my desperate need to have my ears pierced. I mean, you actually are stupid to get your ears pierced. Only stupid people get holes shot in their ears with a GUN! What had I gotten myself into? My dad, under explicit instructions from my mother to have my ears pierced with my birthstone gave me the ultimate bargain, "If you don't cry, I'll buy you a milkshake." Sold! If there is something I loved more in life at age 6 then ice cream, I don't remember it. Unfortunately as I sat on the chair as the Ear-Piercing-Woman-Of-Doom discussed the procedure with me, my true self shined. You can see where this is going. I of course cried through the entire 2 minute procedure and continued to cry for 15 minutes afterwards.

In the 6th grade I was the textbook image of middle-school horror. Bad skin, horrible haircut (no Mom, I didn't look like Julia Roberts in Hook no matter how many times you said so), hairy legs, and the mother of all sins... a bushy eyebrows. Luckily my peers looked just as homely as I did and I wasn't teased. My mom, however, took it upon herself to rectify the bushy eyebrow situation. Unbeknownst to me, she scheduled a hair appointment for me with her stylist, Tony. This was to be the first time I got my haircut somewhere other than Great Clips and being the image conscious pre-teen I was, I was totally excited. Maybe I would finally have a beautiful haircut. Tony cut my hair, but it must not have been too phenomenal 'cause I can't remember anything about it, and then proceeded to lead to me to chair in a part of the salon I had never been in. I had no idea what was going to happen next. I'm sure my mom planned things out this way to avoid the anxiety I would have had leading up to this day. For the next 10 minutes a beautician tweezed and waxed away at the two bushes lying across my face. Once again I cried and freaked out. With huge welts above my eyes, I cried and moaned to my mom for the next few days. Please, pity me.

I don't handle illness well either. I try and deny that I'm sick until I can't put it past anyone anymore and succumb to drinking OJ. My dad's the same way, except his beverage of choice is tea. When I'm sick, though, I hardly speak. That's wrong, I speak, just in tongues. I don't do well when I'm cramping either, hence my lack of desire to ever become pregnant. Sore muscles from working out-- whining. Sprained wrist from falling (thank you Evan for driving off and leaving me in the bushes!)-- lots of crying. Black eye from a flying coaster-- massive amounts of tears, at least out of my left eye.

All of this is to say, I buckled down and got my vaccines on Tuesday. The last thing I need is to come down with typhoid or malaria. You can probably tell how I did when visiting UVa's Travel Clinic alone. When the nurse came in with the shots I wimpered to him, "I'm not very good with shots. I think I might cry." He took one look at me and said, "Oh darling I hate 'em too. But here goes!" Bless that man's heart. He had all three shots done in under a minute, despite my tears. I wanted to be coddled and told stories like all of the other nurses in my life have ever done for me. This nurse, however, was all about efficiency. With a "one, two, three" he's stick me and move on to the next. He was even kind enough to leave the worst shot, Polio, for last. After wiping down my tear-stained face, I thanked him graciously and gave him a hug. What a wonderful man. I just hope he's at the clinic when I have to go back for my Yellow Fever vaccine.

Vaccines Received:
DTAP
Hepatitis A
Polio
Oral Typhoid

Prescriptions Filled:
Malarone- anti-malaria (don't even get me started on the cost of this stuff)
Ciproflaxacin- anti-diarreah

For more information: CDC

PS: I've been "sick" ever since Tuesday. Whining and moaning to anyone who will listen. Evan might just ship me out early if he has to continue hearing me say, "But I can't do it, my arm won't bend!"

What I'm Hoping to Experience

2008-04-13T11:00:00.003-04:00

I'm a big list-maker. I'm not quite sure what it is, but if you were to see my desk at the moment, I have about 3 list going simultaneously. That, coupled with the overwhelming amount of school work left to be completed before graduation means that almost of all of my thoughts about this trip come in list format. Here then is my list of things I'm hoping to do while in Dubai and Tanzania....

Dubai:
* See the World of Islands.
* Put my feet in the Arabian Gulf.
* Ask for a "water with lemon" in Arabic.
* Smoke a sheesha at Sheesha Courtyard.
* Buy raw silk and cotton at Bur Dubai Souq.
* Hear the call to prayer.
* Meet people at an Arabian mid-night bbq.
* Watch a camel race.
* Visit the Heritage House.

Tanzania:
* Make it to the top of Mt. Kilimanjaro.
* Learn traditional Masai dance.
* Converse in basic conversations in Swahili.
* Eat home-made Ugali.
* See East African animals in the wild.... lion, giraffe, elephant, etc.
* Attend a Rwandan genocide trial.
* Drink fresh coconut milk.
* Snorkel in the Indian Ocean.
* Smell the scents of Zanzibar.
* Walk the streets of DES and Arusha.
* Sleep under the stars on Mt. Kilimanjaro.
* Teach Masai women English.
* Play tag with the children at Jane's.
* Read the book, Charlotte's Web, to the children at Jane's.
* Tuck little kid's into bed with a kiss on their nose at Jane's.
* Shower outdoors.

I'm sure more will come. I'll try to update as I think of them.

Top 10 Things Most Difficult to Leave Behind

2008-03-13T18:14:00.002-04:00

I just got back from a long walk (trying to prep for Kilimanjaro) and along the way I started thinking about the items/things that will be most difficult to leave back here in the States. I'm assuming there will be things I don't realize I miss until I'm in Tanzania, but for now there are a few items that immediately come to mind...

1. Evan-- The boy is irreplaceable. Describing why I'll miss him or what I'll miss about him could be a post in and of itself. He's the love of my life. Enough with the cheese... moving on.
2. My family--Although none of us live in the same area (Fort Wayne, Williamsburg, L.A.) I talk to them at least once a day, typically via phone. Giving up those conversations will be hard. Thankfully Megan's a big talker and her parents will be visiting us for the last 2 weeks of our trip. A stand-in family never hurts. :)
3. The Internet-- We live in a technological age and I personally live with a very techno-savy boy. Shamefully, checking my e-mail is one of the first things I do every morning and one of the last things I do before going to bed. The Internet is a way for me to stay connected to my family and friends but also the greater world at large. Hopefully we'll be able to hit up a web-cafe every once in awhile.
4. Cell phone- I'm spoiled by my father in-law, Bob, who pays our cell phone bill through his company. Thus we get new phones every 2-3 years through his company plan. Since upgrading to the newest Sprint phone, I've taken full advantage of all of the gadgets that come with a "smart-phone," like playing Solitaire, checking e-mail, and bugging my sister since she's now on speed-dial. The plan is for Megan and I each to rent a cell phone in Dar Es Salaam and use it primarily for safety reasons in case we're separated.
5. My car-- I'll miss the freedom and mobility it provides. Without my car, I wouldn't be able to do nearly the amount of babysitting I've done over the years or visit my family as often as I do.
6. Fresh water-- I'm an avid water drinker. Having the ability to have purified water come straight from my tap is a luxury. Through some heavy reading, I've learned to drink only bottled water while in Tanzania. Thus, I'm stocking up on my favorite Sigg water bottles.
7. Gluten-free food-- Without access to gluten-free food, my pesky wheat allergy will rear it's ugly head... sore joints, bloating and all. Luckily most of the food staples in Tanzania are gluten-free, but I'm convinced that staying gluten-free is going to be a difficult task.
8. Chocolate-- My sweet tooth is horrendous. There isn't a day that goes by without snacking on some Nutella or ending the day with a bowl of chocolate Ice cream. Hopefully Megan and I will find some decent chocolates in our town of Arusha.
9. Books-- I'm an avid reader and without my library card, I'd be totally bored. Unless I'm absolutely exhausted, I read every night for about an hour before falling asleep. I'm already making a list of the three books I want to take with me, but secretly I'm hoping to hit up a Tanzanian bookstore.
10. TV-- Another shameful treat of mine. Since the writer's strike, I've cut my TV watching by half. I still avidly watch the Today Show in the mornings and Nightly News in the evenings, however. Going without access to the TV for 2 1/2 months will be interesting for the basic notion that I won't be caught up on all of the American drama... AKA: Who won Big Brother? How're the American Olympians doing? Which politician shot himself in the foot with such and such comment?

Why Tanzania?- Part 2

2008-03-07T22:12:00.002-05:00

When all you want to do is go abroad, choosing specifically where to go is quite the challenge. For nearly 4 months, Megan and I sent e-mails back and forth to one another, each time with a different country in mind. Nepal? Too much political unrest. Thailand? Monsoon season. China? South Africa? The list went on and on. Each time we got excited about a specific country, we'd do a little research and come to a roadblock. I began to worry that we weren't going to find a country we could both agree upon. This was a deeply shared dream, but was that just it? A dream and nothing more?

We had a few criteria we wanted met: safe, decent weather, third world conditions, and the chance to work with kids. Originally our top choice was Thailand. For awhile now, Thailand has been my "stare-at-the-map" day dream destination. What isn't to lust over? Buddhist mystique. Tropical climate. Gorgeous beaches. Elephants. It all sounds so perfect. Unfortunately, after doing extensive research, we realized Thailand in May-August would be nothing but a giant rainstorm. Definitely not the weather we wanted to experience for 2 1/2 months. We had to go back to the drawing board.

Ever since my conversations with Quilter and Camp Sunburst, I've been pulled towards the HIV/AIDS community. I'm not sure if it was this gut instinct or something else I don't quite understand yet, but Tanzania simply fell in our laps. When glossing over the countries our volunteer organization (Global Crossroads) offered, Tanzania jumped out at me. I pride myself on being knowledgeable of global current events and perspectives, but here was a country I knew little of. It was in Africa nonetheless, but that didn't phase me. Maybe it should have, but it didn't. I was intrigued by the volunteer options available to us in Tanzania and I once again jumped into researching the country.

Tanzania couldn't have been any better of a fit for me. It's a gorgeous country, or so I've read, located in East Africa along the Indian Ocean. Known for Mt. Kilimanjaro and the Serengeti wildlife, Lonely Planet describes Tanzania as "the country [that] embodies what is for many quintessential Africa." Tanzania is one of the few African countries to have escaped political difficulties and civil unrest. It's a culturally rich country of 100-plus ethnic groups living together peacefully. Unfortunately Tanzania hasn't been able to escape the HIV/AIDS crisis that is gripping Africa by the throat. According to The Global Health Report, by the end of 2005, it was estimated that there would be approximately 110,000 children ages 0-14 in Tanzania living with HIV/AIDS and approximately 1,100,000 children under the age of 17 who had lost one or both of their parents to HIV/AIDS.

Whenever I think of Tanzania, my heart is immediately pulled to the Tanzanian children. Of course everything I know about the situation on the ground is second-hand, but I can't seem to feel drawn to these children. Although her book is about the children of Ethiopia, I've been especially inspired by the words of Melissa Fay Greene in her book, There is No Me Without You. An entire generation of Tanzanian children are growing up with one or more of their parents sick and dying from the HIV/AIDS. An entire generation left to discover life on their own. I cannot fathom this. I also can't fathom not doing anything. Here I am, a 24 year-old college graduate living a comfortable life by all means. I grew up in a loving home with parents who cared deeply for me. I never had to worry about where my next meal was coming from, how I was going to take care of my 3 younger sisters, or wonder why Mom was sick. My biggest fear was talking to the cashier at McDonalds. I was and continue to be so blessed by the incredible people I have in my life. I would be selfish not to share this love with the universe.

People have various reasons for volunteering, especially going abroad to do so. Here I can't speak for Megan, only myself. For me, this trip is a way for me to share all of the beauty and love I've been given in my life with people who are more in need of this than I may be. I'm not going to Tanzania in an attempt to share my religious views, which may work for some people... just not me. I simply want to support the woman and children of Tanzania who may have been given a bad deal of the deck by the universe. I'm taking with me the great memories I've created with all of the kids and families I've had the opportunity to interact with over the years. I'll be tucking kids into bed by kissing their noses and giving them a "magic pill" (an imaginary pill that gives you sweet dreams) just like I did with M&B P. I'll be giving big, squishy hugs like E.C. I'll be teaching all of the girls how to princess dance like G.C. Should someone have an upset stomach, I'll remember how R.K. taught me to sooth "icky tummies." I'll teach little boys how to draw comics like G.T. and how to play football like T.C. I'll teach little kiddos all of the signs M-A. G. has taught me. I'll share with these women every warm hug I've received from Mrs. C. Every inspiring conversation I shared over dinner with the P. family will be shared. All of the love and life you've given me over the years will be tucked gently into my backpack and sprinkled in the spirits of the people I meet in Tanzania.

I'm not sure what to expect while in Tazania, but I'm sure of one thing... this is what I'm supposed to be doing.

Why Tanzania?

2008-03-06T17:44:00.003-05:00

As more people are learning about my trip this summer, I keep hearing the same question, "Why Africa? Why Tanzania?" What seems like such a simple question is really quite loaded. I don't have a simple response and really, don't want one. I'm going on this trip for various reasons and I think that if I broke down my reasons for choosing Tanzania or Africa to one basic response, I would be stifling myself.

The initial seed was planted in the living room of the house I lived in during my Junior year at Butler, better known as 4705. My roommates and I, Megan included, spent many evenings splayed across the living room furniture, laptops at hand, dreaming and conversing. Of course most of our conversations centered around the drama that had befallen us that year, this time was different. A few comments regarding my impending honeymoon (sigh... Fiji... how wonderful you were) led to a collective desire to do more traveling abroad. From there, Megan and I toyed with the idea of backpacking through Europe once we graduated and thus the dream was planted.

After spending the summer in Charlottesville as a newlywed, I returned to Butler to live with my second family, the gracious and loving P Family. All of my former roommates continued to live at 4705 and I would thus make frequent trips over, sometimes with M&B in tow. During this time, Megan and I (both planning on graduating in December) discussed the possibility of a European trip. Unfortunately the timing wasn't right for me and the dream was put on hold.

Although we had put our backpacking plans aside, neither Megan or I could truly put down the dream of going abroad for an extended period of time. My itch became even stronger when I spent time with another of the former roommates. Quilter, a strong, feisty, and incredibly smart girl, had spent the previous summer living in Amsterdam taking an international HIV/AIDS course. I loved meeting Quilter at Hinkle Fieldhouse (where she sat and checked ID's of all the intramural basketball players) and listening to her talk about her time in Amsterdam. I was in awe of her passion for HIV/AIDS prevention and awareness, including her desire to have 4705 go in for a group HIV test. Her enthusiasm for and understanding of the difficulties of the third world's HIV/AIDS challenges oozed from her. It was a pivotal moment for me, one that has truly changed the focus of my life's work.

In December of 2005, I picked up and left Butler and Indianapolis. It was with great sadness and trepidation, but also with a strong sense of inspiration. During the Spring of 2006, as I worked as a nanny, I felt a strong urge to do my part to assist the pediatric HIV/AIDS community in America. I wasn't sure how I was going to go about doing this, but I knew exactly who to blame for instilling in me this desire.... Quilter. After doing some research online, I came across a pediatric HIV/AIDS camp in the San Francisco area. Not being typical of my style, I took the plunge and applied for a volunteer camp counselor position. I was accepted in May and in August I hopped a plane from DC-San Francisco, unsure of what I had gotten myself into.

Camp Sunburst turned out to be another pivotal moment for me-- a stepping stone along this great journey. I fell in love with the campers, some infected, some affected, and the incredible sense of community at Sunburst. I met kids from all walks of life. A girl who had seen her brother shot in gang warfare. A set of twins, one infected, one not. A beautiful culturally and ethnically diverse family of 10+ children with two moms. A young girl whose father was incarcerated and whose mother was infected due to intravenous drug use. And yet all of these children had such resilient, warm spirits. They were vivacious and excited about life. They had hopes and dreams. They lived life to the brim. HIV/AIDS played a major role in all of these kids lives, yet it didn't define them. I found great hope in these children. I learned that HIV/AIDS didn't have to be a life sentence, but that I needed to do whatever I could to support these children and others like them.

For the past two years, Camp Sunburst has been the event in my life. It was what got me through exams and money woes. Flat tire.... oh Camp Sunburst will be here in 3 months.... yay! Standing in the bitter cold waiting for the bus to come... hum the Penguin Dance from Camp Sunburst.... yay! Going to camp was the moment I looked forward to throughout the year. When I visited Indianapolis in the Fall of 2006, I remember meeting up with Megan and talking to her for hours about Camp Sunburst. The conversation returned once again to our deep shared desire to travel abroad. What about volunteering abroad? It was just the spark we needed to rekindle the flames.

From that moment on, our planning is a blur. Megan and I would exchange e-mails and phone calls after spending hours surfing the net for volunteer opportunities. After finding a few reputable companies, I decided it was time to broach the subject with Evan. I am the world's luckiest girl because I didn't have to do any begging or pleading to convince him this trip would be worthwhile. Evan is a man of little words, but he made it known that he was here to support me and my dreams, no matter how crazy they might be. It also doesn't hurt for your husband to have a cushion of money set aside from a not-so pleasant car accident when he was in 4th grade. Dude, I am so blessed.

............. Part 2 of Why Tanzania continues tomorrow .................